A
male
age
51-59,
*artvon
writes:Opionions needed.My Dad past away suddenly this past June. Since then my Mom seem to have boundary issues.She asked to take my Kids to see a local christmas time ballet. I requested that she not buy tickets yet until I check with my wife to see if anything has already be planned and if not maybe we can all go. Next thing I know she not only buys the tickets but then says that if we do not go she will never do anything"nice for my family again". I feel bad that she went and spent two hundred dollars on the tickets but I'm really upset she does not she what's wrong with what she did.Now I have tension with my wife as well.What should I do?
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reader, anonymous, writes (27 November 2007): Your mom is throwing herself into a role in your life to fill a void that she has in hers now her husband has gone. You have to be firm but fair and let her know that you are there to talk, she has not let herself grieve properly and may need you to recognise that before she can. let her be helpful in your lives but make sure you draw a line where you see fit and dont let any amount of emotional blackmail change your mind. Call her bluff, she wouldnt dissown you or anything like that.
Tell your wife that you can let it go this once and that in the future you will stand united on whatever choices you have to make.
I feel that your mom has lost someone hugely important in her life and she just wants to surround herself with and spoil those that are left behind.
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