A
female
age
30-35,
*EXYBIT
writes:i met this boy in the bahamas he works on the beach and i thought it was love at first site he keeps telling me to move to florda so we can live together and get married my mother told me he says that to all the visiters..i have my money saved up and im ready to go is this a good idea??
View related questions:
money Reply to this Question
Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
male
reader, uncle bob  +, writes (25 March 2011):
 Listen to Mom!99.9% of the time, these guys are looking for thathallowed "Green Card".(if it's still called that in the states).Once he has citizenship, you can expect him to either dump you, or at least, bring the rest of his family to live with the two in the states. Your a "gateway", nothing more!Do you notice how he wants to live with you in Florida,and not you live with him in the Bahamas? He wants to live in the US. regardless, and he is willing to use you to do it! Besides, your way too young to even consider marrying the "boy next door", let alone some guy from another country you really don't even know. Besides, if he where really interested in you, he would find a way to come and visit you.The best thing you can do about this guy is to put him in your "happy memories" box, and get on with learning, living and growing.Believe me, you'll be a much happier person if you can avoid making this horrible life long mistake."Youth is fleeting, regret lasts a life time"
A
female
reader, chigirl  +, writes (25 March 2011):
 Listen to your mom and k_C100!!!
...............................
A
female
reader, k_c100  +, writes (25 March 2011):
 NO!!! Listen to your mom - she is 100% right on this. Often when locals, who have poorly paid jobs (like your beach guy), meet tourists who are on holiday they spot the money a mile off and think that if they can persuade the tourist to fall in love with them and marry them, then they can a) get a visa for the US and b) get money from them. This boy doesnt love you, he just wants your money and a visa so he can stay in the US instead of working on a beach in the Bahamas for next to no money. Try suggesting this to him - that you come live with him in the Bahamas. I bet he will freak out and try and give you every excuse under the sun why he should come to the US rather than you go to be with him. If he said "ok, sounds great" then that would show he cares about you, not a visa and money. But I would put good money on him telling you it is a terrible idea and that he HAS to come to the US. Look, teenage love is very intense, I understand that you feel strongly for him and it might seem like a good idea. But love at first sight is not a reason to move miles away to marry someone you hardly know - that is a recipe for a divorce. If you really like him and want to give it a try then just take it slow, get to know him lots better. Maybe go visit him again, he can come visit you etc. If you can last a year together then maybe you can start to consider marriage and moving to be with him, but for now listen to your mom as I know she is right on this. Too many tourists fall for these scams and she doesnt want you to be another one, so test him - see if he really cares by taking it slow and find out if he really wants to be with you, or just wants access to the US. I hope this helps and good luck!
...............................
|
