A
female
age
26-29,
anonymous
writes:Ok, so it all started awhile back. Ever since i was little my parents have pinched my butt, i've always hated it, and whenever i complained they still didn't stop. When i was in kindergarten, i had a little-kid-crush on this kid in my class. Apparently, it was obvious and my mom would tease me almost every night. It really hurt that she couldn't see that it wasn't funny to me. In 5th grade, i had some bully problems and before i opened up to my mom, we did a major clean out of my room. She picked up my diary, which i used to vent all of my feelings, and i stopped her saying something like "thats my diary!" she put it down down. Two days later i got called up to my room. (i always told my parents to stay out of my room) my mom had read my diary! One about the bullies too. Her excuse? She was opening the blinds in my room and saw it, decided to put it away, and looked inside to see if it was written inside where it goes. Apparently over two days she forgot what it was. Wtf? Not only did that insult my intelligence, she had read my diary, and forced answer out of me. I was mad. I cried an yelled at her constantly to get out of my room but she refused to leave until she had gotten all of her answers. Later, for a completely different reason, my bully problems were solved, but because i came to her. Now, my older sister who she always talks to is leaving and all of a sudden she wants to talk to me. She has repeatedly violated my trust and now she keeps saying "you never talk to me!" not only that, but all through my life I've always been a little bit ignored. I'm a middle child, an my dad always hangs out with my brother, and as I've said before my mom hangs out with my sister. I'm so mad and angry. I can't stand her anymore. I want out, sometimes i can honestly say i hate her. There a lot i didn't put in, too. Any advice?
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reader, anonymous, writes (27 May 2011): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionHey thanks everyone! I was really mad when i posted this, so please disregard the "sometimes i hate her" part. You realky helped alot. Thanks!
A
female
reader, Aunt Sabina  +, writes (27 May 2011):
I'm sorry you are having a difficult time with your Mum. Are you able to talk to your sister adout how you feel? Perhaps she will have some ideas about how you can make things better and she may have gone through similar experiences when she was your age.Also it sounds as if you feel rather left out so if your Mum is asking you to talk to her maybe you should do just that. You could tell her how her actions make you feel sometimes and agree some ways to make things better between you. It may take some time for things to improve but it is worth trying. I hope things improve for you soon.
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A
female
reader, RedAthena +, writes (26 May 2011):
 I am so glad you posted your question. You made me think a lot as a Mom:) Thanks! I have a wonderful 13 year old daughter who keeps a diary. We sometimes have discussions about what is private and what is "public" in our home. I view her diary as her private place. It is her safe place to go with her words, feelings and thoughts.You mentioned she read your diary and forced an answer out of you. While I DO believe it was wrong for your Mom to read your diary, is it possible your Mom was concerned about something and felt like reading your diary was the ONLY way to find out? I bet your Mom was snooping in your diary to try to understand you better. It IS a violation of your trust. You have a right to be angry.One of the hardest things to accept is that while you are entitled to your privacy and your space (IE ROOM) your parents own the house. They have the right to go into your room and inspect your belongings, but ONLY with a GOOD REASON.*They think something is going on in your life that you should not being doing that is illegal, harmful, or abusive.Being curious about what you think is not a good reason to snoop in your diary.I am guessing you have an older sister than is moving out of the home and maybe your Mom is going to miss her company?I can understand you being frustrated that your Mom is looking for your attention now.Let her know the most important things you shared here.You want your diary to be PRIVATE and if their are any real problems that she needs to know or get involved with, promise you will let her know.A girl SHOULD be able to trust her MOM! If she can not show that she can be trusted then you will not talk with her much! You are not a little girl anymore and you would like to be treated with some respect.Remember, as a responsible teen, that comes with some duties on your end too! TALK to your parents if there is something really bothering you or you have a problem that needs their imput.Mom goofed up for sure! Speak up calmly how you feel and give her a chance to listen.Best Wishes.
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