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My married lover found out I was talking to other guys and now he's ending things with me

Tagged as: Age differences, Cheating, Troubled relationships<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (13 April 2012) 2 Answers - (Newest, 15 April 2012)
A female Philippines age 36-40, *aluga02 writes:

good day readers! i am so over whelmed when i found out this website that i think can probably help me in my difficulties nowadays.

i am 23y.o. of age and i am so in love with a 50y.o. man. he is married in the other country and has two kids. we are in an intimate relationship for 17months. i admit to myself that even im in a relationship with him i still got too many boys surrounds me... but those men are just for my pass time... in short those men are only for my flirting stuffs... but i can i assure you guys that all of them are just existing into my life through emails and sms only! nothing more! i know my limits because i know i am in a relationship. even he is married he never fails to satisfy me... he even never let me feel that i am just his mistress. because he and his wife is not living in one house anymore...our relationship is so magical! nothing else i can ask for more! he always give his best he can be for me.. until one day he found out everything whats going on my phone between other men... he saw all these men i have into my life... they are nearly 10 of them who keep in touch with me... i was really about to stop all these mess im doing in our relationship. it just happened that he find it out first! now he is breaking up with me... and i cant just give up on our relationship. what should i do to cope up with our dying relationship... i am willing to do anything not just to loose him! im sorry if my story sounds riddling i just really want you to understand how much im sincere to hear your suggestions for my situation. thank you so much for patiently reading my story! thanks! god bless...

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A female reader, baluga02 Philippines +, writes (15 April 2012):

baluga02 is verified as being by the original poster of the question

baluga02 agony auntthank you so much bernard and Foot-In-My-Mouth for your answers and suggestions! i highly appreciated it! :)

hmmm... even i love him so much, he knows what are my plans in my future... he knows that even he will ask me to marry him i wont say yes... im still not ready to get marry sissy... and his character actually is definitely not like "user"... he is not. definitely, i have already met many of his friends, and my friends met him too already. he is such a real nice man... thats why i fell in love to him this much... :(

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A female reader, Foot-In-My-Mouth India +, writes (13 April 2012):

Foot-In-My-Mouth agony auntYou're in a relationship with a man who is cheating on his wife, seemingly has no interest in divorcing her, is old enough to be your father and is breaking off with you because you have male friends? This must be a joke!

How do you know he lives apart from his wife? Because he told you so?

I understand that you love him, you want this to work and you want to save the relationship. However, this won't work because if he was straight, he'd divorce his wife and then start dating you. It seems like he wants to have his cake and eat it too. And please don't use that old patriarchal term to describe yourself...don't call yourself his 'mistress'. Steel yourself and let him go, OP. He doesn't want to marry you, he wants to just have you around and keep cheating on his wife. Do you really want to be with such a man? In the end, all you'll be left with are tears and regrets. Not worth the pain, my dear, not worth the pain.

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