A
male
age
30-35,
*oaloxygen
writes:Have been dating my lover for the past 11mnths and i discovered about 2 weeks ago that she is having afair with another guy. I accused her for this yesterday night and she said it is non of my business if she is cheating on me then she slapped me. Please what should be my next step? Need this answer urgently. Reply to this Question
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female
reader, So_Very_Confused  +, writes (23 May 2011):
 if she is your gf and you do not have anyone else you sleep with then she is wrong
BUT if you are married or sleeping with others then YOU are wrong and she is right.
A
female
reader, CindyCares  +, writes (23 May 2011):
 You call her your " lover" so I assume you are married or anyway taken. In this case, technically she is correct. You do not offer her an exclusive relationship, so why should she offer one to you.
I don't like the slap though- raising hands on your partner is never OK.
I'd stay well away from this violent lover - and out of further trouble for the future.
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A
female
reader, eyeswideopen +, writes (23 May 2011):
 You wouldn't happen to be married would you?
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A
female
reader, chigirl  +, writes (23 May 2011):
 If she's not your girlfriend then she is free to have sex with whomever she pleases and there is nothing you should do about that.
If you are uncomfortable about her having sex with other men you need to make her your official girlfriend, not your lover.
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A
female
reader, amazingk +, writes (23 May 2011):
 If that's how she really feels, then your relationship is already over. She feels no accountability or responsibility with regards to this relationship, and she'll keep doing whatever she's been doing as long as you're willing to take it. Don't. Move on and let it be over because from her vantage point it already is.
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A
female
reader, adamantine  +, writes (23 May 2011):
 By lover do you mean girlfriend, or just a fuck buddy? If it's a monogamous relationship (GF/BF), then it is your business. If it's not, then she is free to sleep with anyone she likes as there is no commitment.
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