A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:HI! I’m 27years old and I'm a married woman with two kids.I'm in a relationship with a white guy, but I love my husband and love this guy so much more than my husband. This guy asked me to marry him and I said yes to him.Now I don't know what to do, because I'm in love with this white guy.Please help me. Thanks for reading my story I hope you will help me
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female
reader, So_Very_Confused  +, writes (20 February 2013):
 I'm not able to address the issue of race... here it's not that big a deal... there I understand it is....
my bigger issue is you are married. does your lover know you are married? does your husband know you are having an affair? if not how could you say yes? you are married and lying and cheating.... and your concern is racial?
so when are you leaving your husband?
A
reader, anonymous, writes (20 February 2013): OP you do know to be with the white guy will not only be very difficult due to racial factor but also in terms of your kids having a white step father and also leaving your husband for a white guy means you're very likely to lose all your friends, some of your family and most likely not be welcome in your community anymore.
Plus who knows what your husbands family reaction will be, this will be very messy indeed.
From what I understand it more depends on where you live in South Africa how bad the situation will be. You're best off finding a south african relationship website or talk to someone you know and trust.
You may have to completely uproot your entire life and move away to be with this other guy.
I think you're making a massive mistake in the first place agreeing to marry someone when you're already married. but you're playing a very dangerous game the way race is treated where you're from. Even in the most cosmopolitan areas mixed race marriages are very frowned upon.
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A
male
reader, Sageoldguy1465 +, writes (20 February 2013):
 Does your lovers' being white "add" anything to the story?
Otherwise, whether black, white, green or any other colour, the situation that you describe (a married woman entertaining - and AGREEING TO - a marriage proposal), goes against all that is normal and sensible in interpersonal relationships and marriage.
Please re-state your question in some manner that cannot be viewed thorough the prism of my last paragraph (above).
Good luck...
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