A
female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:I have been with my boyfriend for almost 3 years and we have been long distance the entire time. I live in Indianapolis, IN and he lives in Nashville, TN. I know that we both love each other dearly but lately things have gotten so crazy. We fight all the time, he wants me to move to Nashville – like soon, but I am so scared. I am so close to my mom (who is recently divorced after 40 years) and I feel that I will be abandoning her. I have been telling him for months and months that once fall comes I would move and now I’m not sure what to do. The thought of starting over, leaving my mom, and our constant fighting scares me. What if I move there, leave my whole world behind and we don’t work out. I will be left with nothing. I will have left my home and my job. I know that I shouldn’t be worrying about that and take it one day at a time but we fight a lot. Over the stupidest things. He hates that I don’t like everything he likes, that I don’t go to church as much as he (even though I’m deeply into my faith – I’m just really busy). He is also in the music business and travels 365. So, I would be moving only to be left alone half the time. Which I knew that would happen when we started dating and I think I’m ok with but he acts like “oh well”. But ultimately it’s the fighting. I mean, even last night he got mad at me because I kept talking about the Olympics and he said that I was being selfish talking about something he doesn’t care about. Granted, things have just been bad lately so I know he was just annoyed but still. Are you kidding me! I need help. What do I do? I love him so much but I’m not sure what to do!!
View related questions:
divorce, long distance Reply to this Question
Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
male
reader, Collaroy  +, writes (13 August 2008):
 Hi,
aside from the rather tumultuous relationship you already have, I would suggest it is crazy to move interstate with a man who will hardly ever be with you. You will be in a strange place by yourself for the most part. You will get very lonely and have to fend for yourself.
I cannot see how this is a good idea. If he was prepared to actually be with you, that would be different , but it sounds like he needs a warm body to come home to after he is on the road. The arguments you're are having now will no doubt multiply...really i cannot see how this can work.
Perhaps its time to think about your future . good luck mate.
|
