A
male
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:Hi guys,I just wanted to ask whether there's other people out there in a similar situation to me.Basically, I'm 25 years old, I still live at home with my mum and brother, I'm single (not speaking to anyone serious either) no savings, I have a car and a great job, spend most of my money on holidays and things ill be able to look back on when I'm older and take recreational drugs (in moderation)I feel as though I Don't really have much direction in life, whatever has happened in the past has literally just fallen into place. Not bothered that I'm single, no desire to move out or anything though. Just not sure if this is normal for someone my age?
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female
reader, CindyCares  +, writes (14 July 2016):
 No, that's the recreational drugs :). Maybe you recreate yourself a bit more than you think, and more than it's good for you. I have seen it happen so many times..."Recreational " drugs may also be not dangerous healthwise, and not addictive technically ( it depends.. ) by they do tend to cause a state of anhedonia, a feeling that nothing is particularly interesting or impressive but the drugs. They make you stay in the " here and now " , but in a negative,self-defeating way, if you know what I mean.
As for the rest... I am a bit baffled. You are 22-25, - still so very young. You are not the first on DC who says " all may classmates are getting married and having kids " ... and I'm like : WHERE ? At 22-25 ?? Nobody , almost literally nobody , is at this stage in my country - which would not mean much, Ok, but both my personal observation ( I have lived in your country, although many years ago, and I have visited it at least 20 times since then ) and most of all the STATS deny what you say. The average age for marriage, first child, house ownership is MUCH higher than yours in your country- so you have just chanced into a precocious bunch of friends but as for you , you are perfectly aligned with your country's general "schedule ".
A
reader, anonymous, writes (14 July 2016): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThanks for the input guys.
I didn't really mention that for my job I'm away from home a lot, maybe the odd week in 3 or 4 I'm at home. But I do pay for pretty much everything myself when I'm at home.
I also have a lot of friends that have gone down the travelling route but that's not something that interests me at all.
A lot of people in my year group at school are now married/have children/have a house and that's what makes me think should I be further on than I am now ? Because in all honesty I really don't want any of those things, I feel like I'm still young and ill be missing out on making the best of my youth ? Think that's my main worry, that I'll be full of regret when I get too old to be having fun.
Maybe it's just a quarter life crisis lol
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A
female
reader, Honeypie  +, writes (14 July 2016):
 All of a sudden you will find that you have passed 30 and still live at home, still haven't gotten any saving and still blowing money on "partying and holidays" and you might start to think what you have missed out on those 5 years, where you COULD have been if you weren't so complacent.
Do you pay your mom rent? Help her with bills? Or are you sponging off her? If you are not helping her, I'm going to say GROW UP and start help paying your way, your mom shouldn't be paying so that you can live the high life - you are over 18, she should be DONE raising you and living HER life too, not take care of you still. Just saying (as a mom and as someone who took care of herself from age 18 and up and STILL managed to move forward.)
And doing recreational drugs, well.... aren't you getting a little old for that? To me that speaks volumes about your maturity level. You aren't thinking at all, you are coasting.
I traveled a LOT in my 20's - but I also had a mortgage, and a paid off car by 24. Travelling was great, I have no regrets seeing more of the World, but it wasn't " Ibiza" or party holidays. Even if they ARE just party holidays, they are nice.. but you might find that IF you can save up for that... you can save up for anything you put your mind to.
Being single is OK, never feel like it's not. But being independent IS something you NEED to move on to.
Some people have a 5 or 10 year plan, you obviously don't and up to a point that is not a bad thing IF it works for you.
Just remember this, LIFE is what YOU make it. If the life you have now is satisfying for you, then maybe that is where you should be. But don't you ever go "I would really like to" xyz goals?
Challenge yourself. Give something back, pay it forward.
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A
female
reader, aunt honesty  +, writes (13 July 2016):
 I had to move back to my family home for a while when I was around your age, and if I am honest it really got me down and made me feel useless. Now that is just how I felt about it. If you are content living at home with your mother and brother well there is nothing wrong with that, yes people may judge but it is your life and your decision. You are single so probably don't see the need to have savings at the moment, as you are not looking at settling down, building a home, or children. That's okay as well. If you are happy then that is the main priority. At least you are working and you are on the road, I hope you help your mother with bills and rent. Spending most of your money on holidays is okay as long as you are also being responsible and paying your way at home, you are an adult and should be paying for your own rent, food and bills. Doing drugs well I am never going to agree with that, to me it is a silly decision and will probably just fry your brain and make you have no motivation for life. My advice, stop the drugs, work hard, pay your way at home and just enjoy your life.
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A
male
reader, Denizen +, writes (13 July 2016):
 If you are smoking pot then that can rob you of any motivation unless you already have a strong creative urge. Sometimes it's easier to do nothing than to change. And why should you?
If you are doing class A drugs then they can become an end in themselves.
We all have a place in this world and we all perform a function, regardless of our ability or disability.
Or as Milton put it:"They also serve who only stand and wait."
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