A
female
age
36-40,
*ox0313
writes:Hello,I get extremely sad, angry, and jealous when my boyfriend looks at other women. Its not that he stares, an attractive woman can walk by on the street and i would feel the same way. Even if we are watching a movie and a sex sence comes up with a womans breasts i get furious that he is looking at her. I hate the way it makes me feel. What can i do to realize i am just as pretty as these girls and i should not get so upset. Please help!
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male
reader, anonymous, writes (2 September 2010): Yick. These people are wrong hun. You gotta stop that bad habit of his.
A
reader, anonymous, writes (5 August 2010): Ah yes... I've been in a relationship where I'd get in trouble for simply watching the television anytime a boob came on. Its good that you recognize it as a problem and that you need help, because honestly, if you feel you have to defend your boyfriend from a television screen... well honestly... you've got no hope of making it last in the real world.
Best of luck :)
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (5 August 2010): I think that you recognize that this is a problem and that it's something about you and not your boyfriend is a really big thing. It's so good that you recognize that it's you.
Do you think your boyfriend gets jealous if you happen to glance at an attractive man, or if there's any sort of male nudity in a movie you're watching?
Here's the thing: it's natural to be a little unnerved when you know your boyfriend is viewing another woman, but if it's just glancing at her in passing, or a brief scene of nudity in a movie, it's not that big of a deal. Every time you feel that way, just tell yourself that it's not a big deal. Once you tell yourself enough, you'll believe it.
Not until it becomes an issue (i.e. he's addicted to porn or he's cheating on you) are these feelings OK, nor will they ever benefit your relationship.
In the meantime, treat your guy special, whether that's taking him out to do something he'd love (golf, to see a "manly" movie, etc.) or being extra special in bed (if you're intimate). I'm sure he thinks you're beautiful, and he'd love to spend time with you!
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A
male
reader, Kenj  +, writes (5 August 2010):
 You have to realise there is a big difference between looking and physical actions. I dont know of any guys who wouldnt look at another woman but it doesnt mean to say they dont love their partners.
Unless your boyfriend is trying to go over and flirt with them in front of you then you need to try and start trusting him more. If you dont then you will end up driving him away from you.
If you see him looking, try talking about something and distract his attention. He may not even know he is doing it but remember you cant control him.
He obviously thinks a lot for you or he wouldnt be with you now so try to relax more, have trust and faith in your relationship together and go with the flow.
Hope it works out for you.
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A
female
reader, maverick494 +, writes (5 August 2010):
You do not own your boyfriend and you cannot chain him to you because chained birds fly the fastest when shown a glimpse of a way out.
Do you see where I'm going here? You have to realise that all these girls he passes on the streets are just that, people passing. He chose YOU as a girlfriend and it sounds like he intends to keep it that way as he isn't openly ogling other girls.
YOU however seem to be determined to sabotage your relationship and stomp down your own self esteem into the ground by these rediculous thoughts of jealousy you're having.
So make a choice. Realise he's a human being just like you or end the relationship and work on yourself because this can only end in misery, the way you're heading.
I can only tell you that you have to change this and maybe if you tell yourself often enough that you are exactly what he wants, you might start believing it too.
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A
female
reader, maverick494 +, writes (5 August 2010):
You do not own your boyfriend and you cannot chain him to you because chained birds fly the fastest when shown a glimpse of a way out.
Do you see where I'm going here? You have to realise that all these girls he passes on the streets are just that, people passing. He chose YOU as a girlfriend and it sounds like he intends to keep it that way as he isn't openly ogling other girls.
YOU however seem to be determined to sabotage your relationship and stomp down your own self esteem into the ground by these rediculous thoughts of jealousy you're having.
So make a choice. Realise he's a human being just like you or end the relationship and work on yourself because this can only end in misery, the way you're heading.
I can only tell you that you have to change this and maybe if you tell yourself often enough that you are exactly what he wants, you might start believing it too.
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A
female
reader, tennisstar88 +, writes (5 August 2010):
 Honey every girl gets a lil jealous..and of course our men only have eyes for us (wed like to think so). All guys are going to look just to look, nothing more..then turn their attention back to us. And as far as the breast scene goes I jokingly cover my husband's eyes when that happens in movies. Theyre just boobs, plus theyre on TV, now urs he's got access to whenever. I know I notice an attractive man every so often, nothing really passes through my head..except for oh he's kinda cute and well dressed..then I turn my attention back to my husband. Bottom line if he's not ogling, his tongue is in his mouth, and he's not like man she's hot, or check out that rear..then cut the boy some slack.
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