A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:I feel like I'm ruining my relationship. I'm constantly craving outward signs of affection, loving gestures and reasurrance... Even though my boyfriend gives me these things (even when they're subtle) a week, a day or some time after I'll feel the need to be reassured again. Why can't I just accept the fact that I'm loved and move on to focus on bigger aspects of the relationship.We're both finishing university in a year or two..we have similar goals and dreams but I'm constantly afraid of my life ending without true love and a healthy relationshipWhy am I so afraid of being alone and unloved when I'm not. I keep focusing on what could happen and not on what is happening.
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female
reader, yoginipirate  +, writes (9 April 2008):
 Trust your instincts, sounds like you are your own worst enemy. Or you have a cold fish boyfriend. Maybe a bit of both. Face it, you won't -all of a sudden- stop needing reassurance & love...but begging for it or obsessing definitely won't help you. However, I started feeling totally unfulfilled, because I REALLY was with the wrong person for me. What do you mean "the bigger aspects of the relationship" if you're in it for love & companionship, what's bigger than that? Sounds like you could use some distraction, like something going on in your life to take the focus out of your own obsessive head & into the world- hobbies, causes, bike riding? Do stuff & quit worrying. No matter how "perfect" everything seems at any given time, you can't predict the future so act on what is right in front of you! A wonderfully young, healthy, active life perhaps?
A
female
reader, LIERIN +, writes (9 April 2008):
 Oh My God !
Are you Me, or am I you? This is exactly how I feel!!!! I have no idea why am I like this, but its definetely a problem in my relationship as well.
Check out self-defeating behaviors !!!!!!
It will help
Good luck
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