A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:I'm 24, and my husband's 26. We've been married for 3 months now.Everything's been good, up until the last few weeks. In the past month, he told me he wanted to become a male model on the side from his normal job. Rather than become jealous, I was supportive of him, and helped him with trying to get some modelling work.In the past month however, my husband's become obsessed (if that is even the best word for it) with becoming size 0. He's been spending all his time researching how to become size 0 on the Internet.He's even started eating less, and eating separately from me when he can. When we're out socialising it's a nightmare - he'll only drink, but rarely eat.I asked him why he wants to be size 0, and he said it's the thing that most male models aspire to be. He insisted he had no body image issues either, and that it'd make our relationship great, and that the sex life would be hotter.We used to have a great sex life, but since he started wanting to become size 0, it's become virtually non-existent, or at worst, infrequent.He used to have a great personality to match his looks (his personality being the thing that attracted him to me), but now that's gone, and I'm worried he'll lose his looks too if he continues.I've tried talking to him about it, but he refused to discuss it with me.I spoke to my sister (who's 30) about it when I went to see her at the weekend whilst my husband was at a business meeting (she lives over the county boundary from me), and told her all about my husband's problem and she insisted he get some professional help and said that what he was doing wasn't right. I agreed with her.However, I don't know what is the right help to get for my husband. I've tried dealing with it as best as I can, but don't know where to go next.Please help me, all advice is appreciated - I really need it.DanielleUnited Kingdom
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, Butterfly Secrets +, writes (16 October 2008):
Hi Danielle, The pressure that men feel to have a perfect body is not much talked about. People are always debating about the affect that the fashion industry's expectations have on young women's health. But very rarely do people acknowledge the effect the 'size 0' culture is having on men. It's sexist. I expect there are many teenage boys and men in their twenties who are going through the same thing as your boyfriend. And there are probably lots of girlfriends out there who feel the same as you!So I think the first step is society engaging in this problem. The more the media says actually size 0 celeb images or fashion expectations can trigger anorexia, the more likely things will change for the individual...Tell your boyfriend your concern for him and remind him not to be obsessed. Because when it's controlling him to the point of an addiction he won't have the strength to be a successful model anyway. The most photographed male models are the ones who look very healthy.
A
female
reader, AskEve +, writes (16 October 2008):
 In the UK we talk about weight in stones as opposed to pounds (as they do in the USA). One stone is equivalent to 14 pounds so a person weighing 5-6 stone would be the equivalent of someone weighing 70-84 pounds int the USA.
~Eve~
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (16 October 2008): OK, now I have to ask, what the hell is 5-6 stone? I know you Brits speak 'kind-of' English, but we Yanks perfected it, and I never heard of 5-6 stone. Help.
Sorry to get off topic here. But I'm trying to learn.
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (16 October 2008): Sorry, being from the US, what is a size 0 for a guy? Women's clothes are sized like that, but not mens. We have S,M,L,XL, etc. Or for pants, like 32" waist, etc...Let him know that if he is trying to be so thin, that he will be a poster child for ethiopia, or just another ugly 'girl-looking' wanna be gay guy. That should fix him.Unless, he does want to be a girl-looking gay guy. Better find out soon.
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