A
female
age
36-40,
*unny2k35
writes:I'm so stressed out at the moment me and my husband split in November last year I had a couple of one night stands and ended up pregnant. Time has gone on and my husband wants to try again I have decided as I am almost 7 months pregnant I want to live separately until the baby is born as I am not sure that my husband Will 100% accept the baby at least this way I have security for my unborn son if we have our own home. The question I am stuck on and need advice with is my husband is already after only 3 weeks of me moving back to the area has started to want sex my sex drive is dead at the moment and I'm just not ready yet its starting to get me down now as I feel the pressure now piling on me he says "I have been patient" but still tries on a daily basis how do I even get through this please help x
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male
reader, Sageoldguy1465  +, writes (27 May 2013):
 WHAT are you thinking???????
First, this guy became your "ex" last November... and NOW he wants to rush, headlong, in to a SEXUAL relationship with you.... despite that YOU are pregnant, and your libido is - understandably - diminished......
AND, you are pensive about how this "ex" will react, relative to your delivering the child of what we might call your "rebound" affair, following your's and his breakup.....
SO.... WHAT does this guy (your "ex") have on you, that you will EVEN CONSIDER having ANYTHING to do with him???? ... NOT TO MENTION "SEX".... since he has shown, quite clearly, that the ONLY thing he thinks about YOU is that you have a warm, soft place for him to put his dick????
How about just cooling things - EVERYTHING - until your baby is born... and then, MAYBE, even THINK about having ANY contact with this cad?????
Good luck.....
A
reader, anonymous, writes (27 May 2013): Actually OP, I have to disagree with Aunty Bim Bim. I think you're the one in the wrong here.
You're leading him on.
I mean you let him think you're ready to give it another go when you're 100% not. OP your time frame is to wait until the baby is born, so why did you start this up before that?
You're not ready to give it another go until after the baby is born. You're not ready to commit to him until you see how he reacts with that child but for some reason you decided to start this up before then.
That's not fair on him if you ask me.
Of course he wants sex, you're just back together after being split up for a few months, and you've agreed to being his wife again when you're nowhere near ready for what that involves and when you're completely unsure of how this will pan out with the child.
You need to have a long deep conversation about where he stands on everything here OP. Sex, the baby, moving in, the time frame you have in mind.
You have him thinking youre his wife again and things are back to where they were but you're not even sure you want to be with him yet and you have very reasonable reasons and conditions that need to be met before that is the case.
OP it's not unreasonable for a man to want sex from his wife. It's not his fault he doesn't quite get that you're not really his wife anymore in anything but paper and there is every chance that in 3 months you'll be walking away again.
This is nothing to do with him being patient and everything to do with you not being forthcoming with him. I bet you haven't even told him he's not getting any sex for at least 3 months and may even have to wait longer if the baby blues is any way severe for you.
Time to clear the air here OP. Time to open up to him and tell him what's what.
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A
female
reader, Aunty BimBim  +, writes (27 May 2013):
 Is sex with you a something he has a right to, regardless of your pregnancy and the fact you will not commit to him until after the birth of your baby.
Does he think that because you had a one night stand and are now pregnant that you must cede up the use of your body whenever he wants somewhere to stick his dick?
Is this insensitive man proclaiming and showing his love for you through his actions?
Are you 100% sure the reasons that existed for you split in November no longer exist, and have not been exacerbated for him by your pregnancy.
I don't hold out much hope that your baby's future will be a very rosy one with this man in it .... he is not demonstrating any love or understanding, he just wants his share of the sex, saying he has been patient after only three weeks, far out ......
Are you sure he is the one for you?
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