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female
age
,
anonymous
writes: My husband of 26 years ago continuously tells everything to his family what happens in our life. Then the family becomes judgmental of our life. This is very humiliating for me. And we don't even live in the same country. They never tell their own private stuff to him, but he tells everything about us. I asked him many times to respect my privacy, but he says there is nothing wrong with that. He can say what ever he wants. Why do you think he is doing this?Now I feel very upset. He would even tell details about our marriage matters. Whatever they ask, he answers uncensored...I feel so intimidated by this, that I feel it might be last drop in the cup for me, and I will leave him. But he says I'm paranoid and there is nothing wrong with that? How would you feel if your family would know every details of your life? He heard it from the counselor that this wrong, but he does not care. So he thinks I'm just sick in the mind, while I becoming the laughingstock of the family.Well, I really think it is enough reason to leave, if there is no way to resolve it. What do you think...? Reply to this Question
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female
reader, eyeswideopen  +, writes (31 January 2012):
 You've been putting up with it for 26 years, why are you addressing this now?
A
female
reader, Stasia66 +, writes (31 January 2012):
You are only as sick as you secrets Ive heard some people say,I'm not a perfect person. I don't believe my husband has told those "people" he calls his family about details about my personal like. They have never been there for him, according to him. So why would he confide in these people? Then hold me hostage at their house all night and talk about all the things he hates about me when the same issues are wrong with him and may be even worse. I'm not a victim of sexual assault, but I've been battered by ex boyfriend's. I feel betrayed once again by someone I trusted and he is nowhere even close to perfect he has the nerve to judge others and me and call me controlling and abusive when all I do is try to stand up for myself and protect myself from him dragging me down with his self destructive behavior. That is his fault not mine. He said all he is doing is telling the truth about me, my past is personal information, he has far more skeletons in his closet than I and I would tell no one and I haven' threatened to. I just asked him, how would you feel if it were you?
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (9 September 2009): You really made me laugh! Yeah, she should know this!
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (9 September 2009): Why do you think he is doing this?Does he have any close friends to talk about thing,or he feels very close to his family? I would certainly wouldn't say anything to mine, what my wife does not want to share. Maybe he likes his family more than you...
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (8 September 2009): quiet-echo I TOTALLY AGREE. THIS is no deal for me. I feel sorry for this lady.
Telling about their kids downfalls is wrong. Its between mom and dad. I think the guy has some issues,if he can't get that...You are not paranoid, just get your word clear.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (8 September 2009): I wonder ,why is he in a need to tell about your private life. And why he can't get it ,that you don't want this? Did you try to ask him? DOes he get it , what is your problem?
Some man can never ever understand ,and way over divorce they will never get it. It is very hurtful, but if it your case, he will never get it. So you will have to take it ,or leave it...
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A
male
reader, softtouchmale2003 +, writes (7 September 2009):
 Yes, there's a simple solution. Ask him how many people are in your marriage? Two people or 20 of them. You married him, not his extended family.
That means, if he doesn't stop talking about your private life, then the door seems to be one way to handle it.
As far as the family judging your marriage, unfortunately he's responsible for that because he invited that. You didn't but he did and that's very sad.
One of the most important parts of a marriage is respect. It seems he has little of it for you. But if you leave, maybe he'll figure it out finally.
I hate to see someone ruin a 26 year marriage over this, but I would also hate to think as you're enjoying your private time together its being ruined by everyone else weighing in on whether the sex was good or bad, or if your dress really was pretty.
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