A
female
age
,
anonymous
writes:Hi,My husband has decided not to have sex with me anymore and the only thing he will say about it is he's old (58) and I am 59, and still feel like I would like that part of my life back. he is nice to me but rarely touches me, hugs or kisses. i think he just doesn't love me anymore. Reply to this Question
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (12 August 2008): my husband and just had a baby 11 months ago and we have other kids that are grown we do have a sex i think he is cheating but he saids hes not
A
male
reader, DoubleM +, writes (27 July 2008):
 I'm 60 and my girlfriend is 61, and we get it on quite well. But I'll admit that, after two heart attacks, my stamina is less than the old days. Again, troubledtoomuch provided excellent advice, and as kastheshizz said, "You are never too old for sex" - it just may not be quite as intense as before in some ways.
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reader, anonymous, writes (27 July 2008): There is one warning that I should have mentioned on male hormone problems. Based on what I have read on healthboards.com, it seems like most doctors know little about this subject. I have had the same doctor for 20 years and he has always been willing to listen to me. He agreed that I had all of the signs of low testosterone and had me tested and started T replacement. Since then I have done a lot of reading on the male hormone thing and found that it is not as simple as just replacing T.
There is a good book by Dr. Eugene Shippen, M.D. - The Testosterone Syndrome. You will find this book and Dr. Shippen mentioned a lot on the Male Health section of healthboards.com. It seems that male hormone problems are a greatly underdiagnosed ailment. For instance, depression is one of the most noticed signs of low T in men and most doctors just prescribe anti-depressants and do not look at the actual cause at all. Then the anti-depressant kills the sex drive even more, as that is one of the side effects of most anti-depressants.
Low sex drive, mild ED and mild depression appear quickly when a man's T is low or his estradiol (E2) is high. Most men of age 60 actually have higher E2 than a woman of the same age. Having excess fat around the waist causes the body to produce even more E2. Many men have normal T and no sex drive because their E2 is too high.
I know that loss of desire to have sex can come from many psychological reasons, most of which are difficult to diagnose. However, hormone problems are easy to diagnose with a blood test if the doctor is familiar with hormones in men and women.
Another thing that many doctors make a mistake with when looking at blood test relults is to think that any reading in the normal range is fine. That is not the case, as the normal range is what the vast majority of men at that age have. In reality, there is only a certain portion or the normal range that allows the body to function at it's peak. The normal range means that a person is alive, but it does not mean that he is actually living, if you understand what I am saying.
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reader, anonymous, writes (27 July 2008): Not much I want to add; "Troubledtoomuch" really answered you very well; I just want to stress the importance for you to COMMUNICATE; you must talk to him; tell him how you feel; do not bottle up your feelings and frustrasions; try and talk to him and find a sulotion and get help to have his problem resolved; maybe an appointment with his doctor could be a good start.
Best wishes and lots of SMILES
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reader, anonymous, writes (27 July 2008): You are deffinitely not too old for sex. My wife and I are both 63 and we still have sex several times a week, most weeks. We are still experimenting with new things too.
I'm guessing that he has a medical problem. At that age I am going to guess it is a hormone problem, like low testosterone and/or high estradiol. If that is the case, then he will have some of the following symptoms: low sex drive, mild ED, depression, mood swings, fatigue, some loss of strength. If he has most of these, then it is pretty certain that it is a hormone problem. It is not unusual for that to start in a man's 50s and 60s. It is sort of a male version of menopause.
If he doesn't have any of those symptoms, except for low sex drive then it is probably something else, perhaps stress at work of financial problems or maybe a slight lowering of testosterone. If he is beginning to have symptoms of ED then he may be worried about his ability to perform sexually and is afraid to try.
As to whether he still loves you - I can't know, but I would place that down the list of posibilities. You need to talk about it to see what he is thinking. However, if it is a hormone problem then he may just not care at all. That happened to me for a few days before I started on various supplements and prescription drug when I was diagnosed with low testosterone 2 months ago. I slowly started to exhibit all of the symptoms that I listed over about a year's time and it got worse over time, especially the depression.
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A
female
reader, kastheshizz +, writes (27 July 2008):
 YOU ARE NEVER TOO OLD FOR SEX!
just sit down and talk with each other you are both human and both had sex before im sure you can get him to go in bed with you if you talk to him.
hope i can help
xoxo(:
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A
female
reader, Emilysanswers  +, writes (27 July 2008):
Well you are not too old for sex. A report out recently said that they older 70's are having more and more sex and are at risk of getting STI's as condoms were not of their time.
I don't think it means he doesn't love you, but it may mean he has a problem. Could there be a chance he has erection problems and this is a way of not letting you find that out?
I think you need to ask him what he is thinking. Even if you have to scare him a little bit and tell him that you are leaving if he doesn't love you. Get him to talk about it and his reasons.
Good Luck!! xx
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