A
female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes: my husband needs space. what should i do and what does he mean? we are still staying together but am in another room. we already have two kids. ive done saomething bad three years ago and he cant forget. what will i do? shaina
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reader, anonymous, writes (15 October 2008): I can speak from experience on this. I too did something bad and my husband couldn't forgive me and told me he needed some time alone to think about things. He never came back. I explained why i had done what i'd done over and over again and the reasons which were valid - ( I'd left my child in a car and gone to work - suffering post natal depression and another child of mine had died at birth) but he still wouldn't forgive me. As tb says some people forgive as it is in their nature other people will never forget or forgive. I always thought if you loved someone you would forgive them anything but it is not always the case. My advice is give him some space and time on his own to think things through. He is not going to be with you in mind and body anyway as he is obviously not pleased with the situation so let him have the time he needs. One thing I have learned is don't keep pushing and bringing the subject up. You have explained why you did something and no doubt justified yourself so let the subject drop. He is going to have to work through this and if he can forgive it is down to him and no one else can make that decision for him. I hope it works out for you.
A
reader, anonymous, writes (15 October 2008): Depends on what you did. If you cheated on him, he may not be able to get past it. If you love him and he's a good guy, you'd better find a way to talk to him and work things out. Some people are forgiving, some are not, and can't let go of the past. Obviously he is upset about something, and doesn't feel close to you. Try to talk to him. Sometimes people just do need space and they can sort of their feelings, and then they are ok. Other times, its the kiss of death. I wish you well.
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