A
female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes: help, i am devastated, my husband and i got married less that a year and my husband(who is 2 years younger than me) has just walk out on me, he said he needs some space and is confused. I ask was there anyone else, he has told me definitely not, i am devastated, what am i going to do, why did he marry me if he is going to walk out like this. He told me he had no doubts before we married. I treat him very well, my heart is broken. I have been treated badly by men in the past and i thought this would be different. Help me please xxxx
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male
reader, binhquangdao +, writes (15 April 2008):
he just needs his time let him be for a while he still loves just he needs some time to think about what he got himself into sometimes us guys rush things and have to take a step back.
A
reader, anonymous, writes (15 April 2008): I am so sorry to hear about your problem. Try and think hard about what led up to your husband leaving. Were you both arguing lots? putting a lot of pressure on him over specific things? smothering him with too much attention? as you said you treated him very well, however he has to treat you well too. Dont be 'greatful' because he treats you well compared to other guys who treated you badly in the past. You deserve to be treated well by your husband as he deserves you treating him well too. In my experience when a guy leaves saying he needs space and is confused, it is either leaving home because there is too much stress at home caused by arguments, or he feels like he is being given no space at home - men dont want 24-7 smothering and attention by a clingy female, or he generally has someone else in his life who is in contact with and he is unsure of what to do whether that be stay with you or leave. I know this much cos of past experience. It could be other factors but I would say its likely to be one of the above.I would give him the space he wants - do not contact him - give him time to think. If you run after him he will run away further still. If he comes back to you, then he genuinly does want you, but it has to be because he wants to and not because you put guilt on him to come back by begging him to come back. Ask him for an explanation when and if he does return home and then You decide whether You want him back or not. I wish you all the best.
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A
female
reader, TELLULAH +, writes (15 April 2008):
Hi Honey,
Right first try to calm down. I know that this is very upsetting for you (especially as its a bolt from the blue). But there must be some reason, even if he wont say what it is. My advice would be to leave him alone for a couple of days, and then to get in touch and try to find the problem out. Dont panick into thinking that there is someone else, there may not be. But if you leave him alone to try and get his act together, he might miss you and get in touch.
Please! please! dont panick, let us know that you are ok.
Be strong XX
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