A
female
age
41-50,
*innomanstix
writes:my husband masturbates every day at least 3 times a day i have never experienced this with him before and its making me feel really bad. the fact that he's maturbating has decreased our sex life from 3 times a day to once every two or three days. I have spoken to him about it and about how it makes me feel but he just seems to keep doing it I mean he's in the bathroom anywhere from 45 mins to 2 hours (no exaggeration) sometimes it makes me feel like crying i do everything he asks in bed and more i don't know what else to do.
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male
reader, PD  +, writes (15 June 2009):
Have you tried asking him direct question like "Does it feel good to be inside me?" after the session? A frank answer may be very revealing. One guess from me is, he feels masturbating "tighter" than your vagina. If this is the case, try advising him to do it with less strength. (Just to share - If I need to masturbate in the event my wife went visit her parents, I wear a condom and do it on the bed face down. In this way, it's the cushion that releases me, not anything more solid.)
A
male
reader, Danielepew  +, writes (15 June 2009):
 Sorry: I think there's something wrong with this guy. I don't think it's stress or whatever. It's about sexual preferences. In my humble opinion, there is little the poster can do to change his mind.
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A
female
reader, cinnomanstix +, writes (14 June 2009):
cinnomanstix is verified as being by the original poster of the questionI don't know I mean I seduce him I even give him lots of oral sex there are times I give him oral sex and only give him pleasure and then we cuddle up and go to sleep or he goes outside or whatever it is he dicides to do after he doesn't work but that doesn't seem to bother him he actually seems quite happy now that he has some time off he says he does it because he likes it tats all he says to me
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A
female
reader, cinnomanstix +, writes (14 June 2009):
cinnomanstix is verified as being by the original poster of the questionWell I never deny him sex never and when we have sex I always tell him how great it was because it always is he always makes sure I have the best orgasm and vice versa at first it didn't bother me because he was still having sex with me and he wasn't masturbating as often but now I don't know he just got excessive with it I don't know am I wrong for being upset about it. If he wants sex 1000 times a day id give it to him and he knows that
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (14 June 2009): You say you have talked to him about this, and that's really positive, but it looks like he didn't tell you the reason. All men masturbate whether they are in a relationship or not, but from your description his behaviour seems to have changed very markedly. You really are going to have to sit him down and try to get the answer out of him, because I get the feeling that there is something he's not telling you, and maybe he's ashamed to tell you. Don't read anything ominous into my last sentence, but have there been any changes in circumstances recently (job, home, family issues?).
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (14 June 2009): that's a very tough spot to be in. It is a blow to anyone's self steem when your partner finds more pleasure in masturbating than in you. There's nothing wrong with masturbating as long as your single and have nobody. I thinl you need to be apart from this guy for a litle while.
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A
female
reader, cinnomanstix +, writes (14 June 2009):
cinnomanstix is verified as being by the original poster of the questionWell I never deny him sex never and when we have sex I always tell him how great it was because it always is he always makes sure I have the best orgasm and vice versa at first it didn't bother me because he was still having sex with me and he wasn't masturbating as often but now I don't know he just got excessive with it I don't know am I wrong for being upset about it. If he wants sex 1000 times a day id give it to him and he knows that
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A
male
reader, Danielepew +, writes (14 June 2009):
This is a tough one. I understand your feeling so bad, because he seems to prefer masturbation over sex with you, even though you do what he wants.
Sometimes people masturbate, behind their partner's back, because they want sexual relief more frequently than their partner. That does not seem to be what is going on with him, because now you have sex less often, due to his masturbation, and you have already talked to him. A tough one.
I think you have to think carefully about where this situation is leading, and what you can do about it.
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