A
female
age
41-50,
*LLIESMUMMY08
writes:Oh where do i begin.... me any my husband have been married 8 yrs and together 10, but over the past year we have drifted apart, well he hasn't but i have... in 2005 he messed me around and left me twice for his ex wife, then my eldest son had a near drowning on holiday which left me gutted, he was on a life support machine and i was 23 and being away from family and having to cope alone really messed me up.....then i had a fantastic career and was made redundant, then my 2nd son was diagnosed with adhd and is a complete nightmare! i have to stay home every day with our 2yr old and then deal with our 2 other boys who are 11 and nearly 7 and they are so difficult, my 11yr old has major problems from his accident and my 6yr old has adhd and screams constantly, then dealing with a 2yr old with the terrible twos.... I just feel invisible, ive asked my husband to move abroad and start afresh but he says no, i can do it alone if if i want. Normally he is so caring and loving, but recently he seems to treat me like im invisible and i feel so unloved and left to deal with 3 children who are impossible, i cant do it alone but all he says is "oh i feel bad im sorry" i know he has to work but he doesnt help by ignoring me when i ask for help or try and tell him im mentally messed up. Ive been to the doctors who prescribed me anti depressants, which just made me sleep all the time which you can't do with 3 kids. at the moment, i hate him and want to be a million miles away but cant afford to. xxx
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male
reader, MikeEa1  +, writes (12 February 2011):
 There's one thing for sure, you need support. You should join a support group of people who have problems with children. there is at least an adhd support group. it may be an option to put that child on medication. it can help with their learning if nothing else. your husband may well be finding the siuation to hard for him and wants to save his life. this is double bad for you because not only are you needing support but you are losing the little support you're getting. things like this happen. you have to seek out support like I said at the start and then maybe in the future when you are handling things ok by yourself you can explore the possibility of another relationship. bad circumstances such as problems with children can erode relationships by making it impossible for the partners to spend quality time with each other. maybe you should talk to your husband first unless you think the siuation is already past that.
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