A
female
age
30-35,
*aria rubi
writes:Hi everyone! after a year im here again, dearcupid was been my adviser for all of my lovelife and good they dont fail me to help. I am now married for half a year, me and my husband we've been together for 2 years, I love him of course hes been a 20 years older than me, suddenly after our marriage just for 2 days he left outside the country for our business and also he has work there, and so that i can follow him there, i requested for a visa and it takes 10 months or more to be approved, we've been emailing back and forth and share moments together through internet, I have been managing our business here too, BUT one day one of our employees was been to good to me, makes me laugh, in a way that I can sense he likes me really, but hes just afraid to tell me because he knows im married,I am just ordinary lady, simple, and I wont let my employees call me mam, all were equal, but I just ignore the feelings, NOW at this point we've been together already for work because hes work requires that all day stay with me managing together, hes been texting me lately, staring and being so sweet, like actions speaks louder than words, but hes not saying what he feels instead he just keep an eye for me always and I can sense that, he makes me laugh, he comforts me, he helps me at my work, and what a bf does, but were only friends, now i think im falling in-love with him, but im afraid because i have my husband and I dont want to cheat at my husband who loves me very very much. What shall I do I cant stay away with him, I dont know what to do day by day im dealing with this.Aunt Help!
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reader, anonymous, writes (3 May 2012): I'm glad to hear u understand its wrong I'm really sorry you had a misscarriage that isn't easy and you need to let him no not 2 b rude to u because of that its hurts you to and its something you have to work on but I will say I understand the flirting situation but u really don't want it to get out of hand my husband is in the army wen he's deploied I feel so alone and it feels good when guys check u out and say nice things but I would never act apon them I married and beleave me marriage isn't easy I hope all goes well for the both of you just really try thinking of ways to make that spark come back you may feel like you don't love your husbands sometime but that's wen u fall in love all over by getting that spark back there's a reason you fell in love in the first place!
A
female
reader, maria rubi +, writes (2 May 2012):
maria rubi is verified as being by the original poster of the questionhi to all thank you for the advises, I love my husband, its just lately he was very excited that were gonna have our baby, and because of stress and etc. it was all down to miscarriage,I lost our baby, and a week i think hes upset, i kept emailing him love letters and replied like really upset with me, but anyway, I will save our marriage and I must, feelings like this is come and go, just trying to set us apart, i think on my current situation its an adjustment stage, and i must deal with this, and because I also misses my husband's presence, that I mistakenly found someone for his replacement, but I will never do that, I have been loyal and honest to my husband before when were not yet married, how bout now, were already married.
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A
female
reader, person12345  +, writes (2 May 2012):
 You have to find your way to distance yourself. Establish yourself as his boss, don't text him about non-work related business, don't talk about work related business. When he tries to change the subject, steer it back to work.
Think about how you'd feel if you found out your husband was interacting with another woman like this. It would be very upsetting. Don't do that to your husband.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (2 May 2012): Do you remember the vows you made to your husband when you got married? Didn't you mean them? Isn't he your forever?Then THAT is what you should focus on. On your future, with your husband. Just because he is out of sight, does not mean he should be out of mind!Your marriage is still very new, and it should be easier to commit to your promises, than many years from now when there is disappointments, hurts and resentments. Many people have endured all of that - War times, death of children, and many other troubling times, and they stick together. He is overseas working FOR YOU, for your marriage and family and future. The least you should do, is be honest, loyal and faithful - to HIM, your HUSBAND.Yes, we are human. Yes, we have feelings. Yes, we also have free will. Just because a colleague, employee or friend is helpful, kind, thoughtful, and all those nice things, they should just remain a FRIEND. Set strong boundaries, so that your marriage comes first. Make regular contact with your husband. Write him a journal, a daily one, so that you are thinking of him all the time. Send him emails. Keep your love alive, if it is worth it, then fight for it.Don't allow just any man to come along and sweep you off your feet, just because your man is away. Be stronger than that. Show your integrity and character. Show your love for your husband, by being his girl. Wait for him.I know you love easily, and freely, but make sure it's directed towards your husband. Imagine it was him, that the roles were reversed, how would you feel?Good Luck
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