A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:me and my husband have been together on and off for about 4 years~we have always had our ups and downs but he always would rather go hunting or spend time with his friends than me and our child he tells me that because i dont work i dont really have no say so in what goes on~he also talks down to me and is verbally abusive i really think that it is me sometimes and i will apologize even when i feel like i have no reason to be sorry just to keep down conflict~he never tells me that i am pretty or any kind or compliments and i think it is because i went from being 120 pounds to 150 after having our child i dont feel like he is attracted to me anymore and he has never been one to be affectionate but he really is never affectionate anymore what could i do to be a better wife other than go to the gym several times a week?? Reply to this Question
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (9 June 2008): Well first you need to quit apologizing. And maybe you should get a job, NOT because he said so, but because that would make you a little more independent of this man. He's using who you are against you. He's saying that you have nothing going for you...that's awful. I mean you are a housewife and you take care of your kid. That's alot to do.
He's not a nice guy to you. The fact is that the more you try to find acceptance from him the more he is going to deny you. If I were you I would go out and start working and making my own life apart from him and not expect anything from him. And maybe move out and eventually find someone new...
A
male
reader, Smiffy  +, writes (9 June 2008):
 Whats the connection between you not working and showing affection.....dont understand...I would say day to day looking after him and your child is more than enough work...sounds as though you are married to a "plonker"
Does your husband understand what it means to give respect??
If you have just had a baby...Im not surprised you have a few extra pounds....most normal men find this attractive...especially as the reason is that you have had a child together....
No one should accept another "talking down"....thats not life......I think you have to think long and hard about what you want for you and your baby???
Good luck
xxxxxxx
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