A
female
age
,
anonymous
writes:Recently my husband hit me. He had been drinking and he lost his temper. He had no recollection the next day, has apologised and promised it will not happen again. I just don't know how I feel or if i'm stupid to believe him. He is a drinker anyway, but has never hit me before.Should I trust what he says?
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female
reader, amanda520  +, writes (3 March 2010):
when my husband drinks he gets mean first he was only yelling at me then after a few years he would slap me pull my hair and just the other night we went out for his b-day and he drank for 7 hours we got home and it waqs so scary he was hititng me so bad theres bllod all over my house i have brusies everywhere im so sore I have never felt so scared in my life I felt he was going to hit me all night.He said he was sorry that he dont remember hitting me but its kinda funny that he remember everything else that night. So he said he wasnt going to drink anymore we went out to eat tonight at 32oz budlight draft. I guess promises are not real. I think they like to blame us for their action if only I wouldnt asked him to sleep on the couch that night he would never hit me..
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (27 November 2009): I am in a similar situation, only for me it has happened once before, 2 years ago but he didn't exactly hit me. The first time he just snapped during and argument, dragged me outside, threw me on the front lawn and got on top of me with his hands around my neck (not choking me but as if he were)yelling at me. Then he snapped out of it, realized what he was doing and got off of me. He promised then that it would never happen again, but 5 days ago it did. Again alcohol was involved and again he threw me down and did the mock choking thing, only this time it was on the bed by our window and when he jerked my head back and forth I hit it on the windowsill. He doesn't really remember too much about it, only that it happened. After I pushed him off of me and he snapped back to reality, I was so angry and hurt with him that I slapped him, he did not get upset with this he just let me. Now I do not know what to do. We have only been married for a month but we dated for 6 years. I am at a loss as to what to do. We still love each other very much, and he is trying so hard to make it up to me, but I am just so angry with him that I can't even look at him. I have been sleeping on the couch since it happened simply because I can’t stand the thought of lying next to him that is how angry and hurt I am. I think I am more upset about the fact that he broke a very important promise than I am about the actual incident. He wants to just forget it happend and move forward, he asked why we can't just think of it as a fight that got really out of hand on both parts (because I slapped him too), vow to never let it happen again and move on. Honestly I wish it were that easy for me, but I can't get over it. It has been a week and I am still so angry.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (6 November 2009): I am a recovering alcoholic and have been told that during a bad binge a few years ago I blacked out and hit my husband (embarrassingly, I have no recollection of it happening). From my own personal experience I can tell you no, do not trust him until he gets sober. Alcoholics are capable of doing anything while drunk. They turn into an unreasonable person, out of control and certainly not trustworthy. Encourage him to get help and I encourage you to seek out a support group.
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A
male
reader, CaringGuy +, writes (6 November 2009):
No, don't trust him. Perhaps he should give up the drinking if he's going to start abusing you.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (6 November 2009): Only until he drinks again. Statistics prove that most abusers are also drinkers. Once that line has been crossed, it will more than likely happen again. I would want more than promises.
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