A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:My husband can't seem to ejaculate during oral. As I've researched this it seems like it's a pretty common problem, but the reasons seems to be it's not enough or oral isn't done long enough. I have never timed myself, but I know I have gotten him to the point where mentally and physically he wants to ejaculate, but his body just doesn't cooperate. Occasionally, he has gotten the slight sensation of an orgasm, but never the full orgasm and release, so to speak. Is there something we can do? Should we see a doctor? Could it have something to do with the fact that he has a vasectomy? He said it has never happened for him, and I give the best performance of any woman that he has been with. (I know, take that with a grain of salt and all, but I said it for what it's worth)
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female
reader, Gabrielle Stoker +, writes (24 June 2011):
 There are some men who just won't come through oral. Not a whole lot, but they do exist. I'm more experienced (and dare I say, more skilled) at giving oral than anyone I've ever heard of, and there's always the occassional guy for whom oral just doesn't work. So don't sweat it, it's not you, it's him.
A
female
reader, angelDlite  +, writes (24 June 2011):
 the tip of the penis is the bit that counts so give that plenty of attention with your mouth,use tongue to tickle the underside of the penis near the tip, use hand on the shaft as well to pump using a nice grip, with a slightly twirling motion too, gently tickle, touch balls with other hand, plenty of saliva. watch some porn to see good techniques. ask your hubby how he would like you to do it. is he happy with handjobs? just do the same but with your mouth doing its work at the tip, change speed if you seem to be losing him a bit.
or maybe you can just accept the fact that oral is not his thing? maybe its the very idea of it that puts him off. :) i couldn't cum from oral if my life depended on it! which is something that boyfriends never seem to want to accept!
x
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A
female
reader, RedAthena +, writes (24 June 2011):
 It is not a physical thing you are or are not doing.
More than likely it is mental.
Since it has NEVER happened for him, it more likely psychological. He enjoys it, so do not give it up, but stop making orgasm the GOAL of oral.
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A
female
reader, chigirl  +, writes (23 June 2011):
 Hey, relax. This isn't a crucial part of sex to him, he's never been able to come that way.
Ask him "is it important to you to orgasm through oral sex?". If the answer is no, then let it be. I'm sure he enjoys it a lot, as it's a different form of stimulation, so do continue to give it to him. But don't pressure yourself to have to make him come. If he doesn't, he doesn't, accept that.
If he'd like to experience it, work together towards figuring out how to make it happen, but also remember that it's when you don't try that it is most likely to happen. Because, like with all things, the greatest things come when you aren't expecting them. So try to relax some and do it for enjoyment and leave the pressure behind.
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A
male
reader, ironman777  +, writes (23 June 2011):
Hi - I'm the same, never ejaculated through oral, although I wonder what a real pro at giving oral sex would be able to achieve....it does feel good, but one thing I worry about and it probably does affect my ahhhemmm performance is the old swallow verses spit discussion. Personally seeing my lovely ladies face screw up in disgust and then her spitting out semen is pretty disgusting and would put me off. Presumably she has thought the same thing and I guess wonders what it tastes like. Who knows it may taste ok???
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (23 June 2011): It's never happened to me either despite the best efforts of quite a few women. Maybe there's a sort of mental block, like perhaps he thinks it's not right to cum in a woman's mouth and his brain won't let him.I think in my case it's fear - fear of getting my bell-end written off by a set of gnashers. Early in my sexual 'career' I was the victim of a woman whose enthusiasm wasn't in doubt but her teeth caused quite a lot of pain.All I can advise is that you use loads of saliva, keep your teeth right out of the way or covered by your lips and use your fingers too. Get yourself comfortable, take it nice and slowly and only speed up if he does. If you can, try deep-throating which will generally keep his bell-end away from your teeth and in contact with the fleshy part of your throat.
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A
male
reader, Drew21  +, writes (23 June 2011):
 Eh, i'll speak up here :p. I'm a man who has never ejaculated during oral. Many have tried, none have succeeded. I'm actually at the point where i really wish my wife wouldn't try to give me oral, cause it does nothing for me. (She feels she has to, though, as i go down on her a ton.)
I've always found that they just don't know the right spots to hit/rub, and the proper pressure to apply. Normally what they do actually is really REALLY uncomfortable. They just can't hit, for lack of a better term, that G-spot, know what i mean?
I also have to admit that i'm normally a very dominant lover, and i'm not very good at patiently sitting there and not doing anything. I sometimes wonder if my mental outlook on the whole ordeal factors in, know what i mean?
I'll let my wife go down on me for maybe a minute or two, and then i just take over (and she admits that she is actually a pretty submissive lover.)
But yeah, that's my 2 cents :P
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A
female
reader, aunt honesty  +, writes (23 June 2011):
 I don't really think there is much that you can do some men just don't reach orgasm through oral sex. While you are giving oral sex just make sure you use your hands plenty as well as your mouth probably on its own is just not enough. as am sure you know all men are different and enjoy different things so try out new things and tell him to tell you what feels good.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (23 June 2011): do something else till he is about to and then swap to oral. doubt doctors will help tbh
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