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female
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*teviemac614
writes: hello. i need help. my husband and i separated in march (10 months ago), because he was talking to other females and lying to me about it. we argued all the time, finally i left. in april i started seeing an ex boyfriend, but the problem is he is engaged to a girl he's been with every since we broke up 5 yrs ago. they were supposed to get married this past may but, she told him she cheated on him a yr ago, they worked through that. they were supposed to get married this upcoming may, but he has postponed the wedding again because of me. i know i love him and he tells me he loves me, but i don't know what to do. we spend more time together than they do, but i get aggrevated when he can't see me because he has to see her. do i stop seeing him or do i just wait it out and see what happens. please help!
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female
reader, willywombat  +, writes (15 February 2006):
 Yes, you should stop seeing him and give him a chance to see if he can work thru this thing with his legitimate fiancee. After all do you want a serial cheater on your hands later.
Move on and let him go. Find somebody new who is free to love you back.
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (15 February 2006): Does anyone else see the irony in this? You left your husband because he was TALKING to other women... but you are SLEEPING with a man who is engaged. Honey... you are a train wreck!Do yourself a favor. Divorce your husband. Leave your Ex. Don’t date anyone for at least six months and then start into something that is open and honest.
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A
male
reader, Mr.Ed +, writes (14 January 2006):
 Honestly, I'm happy that your happy as long as your with him, however one does begin to wonder just how many fires you've started and how many you'll put out. This guy has to see the other girl right; or what? She'll leave him? That would be great for you but what about your understanding the mess that's created. Now he has left a commitment to another, for you. You haven't even finished your commitement. Did you really seperate from your husband because he lied about talking or is there more to this than you have stated. I wouldn't seperate just because someone lied. Cheated yes, lied no. I would be mad, angry, upset, hurt, but not enough to leave. If my calculation are correct; and they are (this might get you mad) You conveniently just happened to run into your ex-boyfriend, and start seeing him right away, less than 30 days after your leaving your husband. I'm truly sorry for this but you really take the cake on this one. I've been in your shoes honey and believe me that's the best bulls*&t I've ever heard. You sent in your letter telling everyone how poor you, can't decide what to do. Here's some food for thought. First, legally seperate from your husband; as a matter of fact since neither of you can be trusted just divorce. Second, You don't need advice when you wrote "I LOVE MY EX" that's your answer. Third, practice safety as your new ex is definately having the cake and eating it too; what's so bad is you allow it. Lastly, I'd think long and hard about any future plans with a guy who can jump back and forth and fails to commit to at least manogomy (might want to look at yourself while your at it).
Sincerely
Ed
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A
female
reader, chikpea62 +, writes (14 January 2006):
are you kidding me? this guy has his cake and is eating it too. if it didn't work then why should it now. find someone completely new to date and start fresh. lose the baggage that you have and move forward. how can you get to your destination if you are going in reverse?
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (14 January 2006): I think the best thing to do in your situation is to wait it out. This will be the big test!If he is being totally honest and telling you that he loves you,and If he postponed the wedding "again" then chances are he is seriously considering leaving her to get back with you. Realize this though... he must be feeling just as confused as you right now and has two women pulling at his "heart strings." You are in the middle of a Love triangle right now and I sugggest you use your "smarts" about it and caution! You are already frustrated by him not being able to spend time with you when he's with her. Take it as a "red flag." He is also going to be re-thinking of why you two split up to begin with. You should consider this also. You are really taking a big risk.You could be the one to end up getting hurt in the long run.Give it time!
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