My heart says to meet with her and discuss it, my head says run for the hills.

A male age , *tullfan1952 writes:

I have been dating a lady for about nine months, and we both agreed at the outset that this would be an exclusive relationship. I am just out of a marriage that lasted 26 years, and she has been divorced for 2 years after a marriage of 30 years. Everything was going fine, and I found myself falling hard for her. Well, just last week she announced that her ex-husband was coming to stay for a week at her house. (She had mentioned it in passing before). She said he would be living in an apartment downstairs. Of course I was unhappy with this, but she insists they are just friends, and that I am jealous and insecure. But they have been hanging out together, and playing golf, going to dinner, etc. She says he is here to discuss family business and that is all. But I can't help thinking there is more to it than that. They had seperated before, and reconciled. So you can see where my insecurity comes from. She says that whoever is in her life must accept her relationship with her ex. No discussion. I love her, but find this restriction to be unacceptible. I asked her if the three of us could go out to dinner while he was here so i could meet him, and put a face to the name, so to speak, but she sent me a curt message that she did not want this. We have planned to meet when he goes home to talk about this. She seems adamant that he will always be in her life and I should like it or lump it basically. My heart says to meet with her and discuss it, my head says run for the hills. What should I do? Thanks for any help.

View related questions: divorce, her ex, insecure, jealous

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