A
female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:Hello, I'd appreciate some advice on the head verses heart question. My ex and I had been together for 8 years. We broke up 12 months ago - we were living together, and he moved out. We had been having lots of silly arguments, he was always tired and never seemed to have time to do relaxing things with me. He thought his life would be better if he moved closer to work and if we split up. It broke my heart when he left. But then I found out he had been posting himself on singles websites and having a 'thing' with a woman from work whilst we were still together - I was really angry but tried to understand why he did these things. Somehow, we stayed friends, and 6 months ago he decided he wanted us to get back together. He said I was the one he wanted to marry and have children with. At first, I was happy but cautious. So we've been seeing each other at weekends and stuff, and for a while I was over the moon. Then, one month ago I found he had a secret cell phone in his cupboard. I haven't said anything to him about that. He says nothing happened with the girl at work and says she's left her job now, but I don't know if that's true. And he often forgets to call me when he says he will. Also, our sex live is non-existent! Basically, I feel like I'm doing all the running, and am finding it hard to trust him again and spend a lot of time feeling sad. My head says this is not good for me... it took me a long time to pull myself together after he left, and now I feel I'm going backwards. My head also says I cannot trust him, and that isn't a good basis for a marriage/family. But in my heart, I love him. Does anyone have any advice on what I should do? Should I follow my heart or my head? Thanks.
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (17 April 2009): deffinatley follow your head on this one, im guessing that your a time filler until someone else comes along.
There is are so many men out there who are looking for what you want in life, and who wouldnt be posting on singles sites.
Go out there and get what you deserve
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