A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:Been with my partner for just over a year, my only problem is...I've gone down on him many times, but he has never gone down on me.He told me he would touch me "down there" more often even possibly go down on me if I.....Shaved.and by this, I'm guessing shave completely.I have had previous relationships in the past where I was young (16) and shaved for an ex, but as I've got older I've never had to ask a guy to go down on me, or have had to shave in order to get pleasured.I don't really want to shave it completely so it's bare...but being without a man going down on me for more then a year...is a killer...what should I do?I know what if I shave it will grow back, but I don't like the feeling of being "bare"
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female
reader, chigirl  +, writes (24 October 2015):
 How can you not have seen each other naked, yet have had oral sex? Doesn't that require nudity, or do you have sex with the clothes on?
I would try to get intimate enough to have sex with the clothes off, and being naked together, before you move on to having oral sex and debating whether or not to shave.
As for the shaving part, it will grow back out. It's not really a lot to say, the guy isn't obligated to give you oral sex just because you go down on him. It's not a game of tit for that. You do things because you enjoy them, or you don't. If he needs you to be shaved for him to enjoy going down on you, and you want him going down on you, then shave. Or keep it very short and neatly trimmed, and DO wash up before, or else there will be a smell, and while some people don't mind it, others do. It's natural, not personal, some people like it and others just don't.
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (24 October 2015): Some men are turned off by hair there, I kind of disagree with people saying tell him to shave because if you give a guy a blow job you wouldn't have all his hair in your mouth as it wouldn't be on his actual penis.
If your partner was asking you to give him a blow job you wouldn't have to do that if you didn't want to, the same as if he doesn't want to go down on you if there is hair there.
As for not seeing each other naked after a year I find that really weird! You sound incompatible sexually so I would find somebody else who would do the things you want and like it :)
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (24 October 2015): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionI do trim and keep it neat. I leave the hair on top but shave the other below part where theres hair...
My partner and I haven't even seen each other naked, and we've been together for a year!!
contemplating maybe going back an ex even though I love my boyfriend, cause at least I'd get all the things a woman wants :/
so frustrating!
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A
male
reader, olderthandirt  +, writes (24 October 2015):
 Turnabout is fair play... Ask him to be first to shave, whoa, I'll bet he will change his tune quickly.
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A
male
reader, no nonsense Aidan  +, writes (24 October 2015):
Well if you’re not prepared to shave down there, that’s your right and you should tell him that it’s not something you want to do. In that case you either have to accept that receiving oral from him is out of the equation, or see if there is an opportunity for compromise. Perhaps you might like to consider not going down on him either if this is otherwise going to be you doing all the work and him compromising on nothing. Then you’ll know whether he really doesn’t like oral with an unshaven partner or whether he’s just not trying to meet you half way in the hope that you’ll do something you don’t want to in order to please him. The fact is though, that if he still turns out not to be prepared to give you oral pleasure even if he loses the receiving of it from you, you might have to decide just how important this issue really is to you and whether you could do without. If it is a deal-breaker, you have to be honest with him about that.
I wish you all the very best.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (24 October 2015): Don't shave, just trim and keep neat.
If he still won't, you'll either need to live without it (this option sucks) or find a new boyfriend.
Sexual compatability is important so maybe have a chat to him about your concern.
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