A
male
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:I am 20 and I'm dating a 48 year old man. when we first met we had sex all the time like on command but now that were approaching our year anniversary he's all of a sudden uninterested in sex and getting out the house meeting new friends, or getting out the house for anything for that matter. So whats the deal with that? When he claims he loves me and wants me but he doesn't treat me that way. Should I just go my separate way and say screw this?
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male
reader, lboy  +, writes (6 July 2008):
 dear reader,
i think that if you are alreday thinking about leaving this guy because he has lost interest in sex i think that you obviously don't love him as much as you think you do. his reasons for saying no to sex may just be because he wants to test and see if the two of you can hve a healthy relationship with out having to have sex, i think the next time he goes out with friends you should ask to go with him, if you suspect him of cheating then when he says he going out ask who with, then possibly call the people he's with later in the night and say you couldn;t get through to his phone, this is a none incriminating way of finding out the truth, your reasons for calling seem completely genuine, just please don't go breaking up a relationship with someone because the sex has started to become noone exsitant, i understand that for some people in some relationships sex is a key factor, but maybe if you love this person you should learn to look past that and love him without having to show him pyhsically, make him feel that you love him, do things for him that tug at his heart stings, show him how well you know him, show him how much you love him. well thats all i got.
good luck
lboy
xxx
A
female
reader, Artistry +, writes (5 July 2008):
 Hi, Now I am going to ask you a question, don't be offended, this is life, and life has its ups and downs. Do you and your friend or lover, talk? By that I mean,do you have meaningful conversations about things that interest you both? A relationship has be be built upon things, the two of you have in common, besides sex. It seems, as if your guy was thoroughly attracted to you for sex, and than like anything, if you have too much, like too much candy, it can get old. So you have to have a foundation to build upon, if not, you two will start to drift apart, no matter how good the sex had been. So, if you relly love the man and want to pull it all back together, you have to find a way for the both of you to communicate, be intimate in a way, that is not just sexual. It is a great thing to be, you become connected as human beings, bonding, which can last a long, long time. See if you want to do this and if he is not too far gone, that you can't pull him back. The other thing is, you must look at the age difference, any relationship has to be worked at. When there is a age difference, sometimes you must work harder. What are his interests? What are yours? See if you can meld them, so that you each enjoy what the other has to offer. If you eat carrots all the time, it is very boring. Expand your horizons, hopefully he will be interested in doing this also. If not, pack it up, consider it a life experience, and look for the next best thing that will find you, life is also an adventure, there is so much to learn. For one thing I just learned the other day that you can put a dash of black pepper in your wash, and it will stop the colors of your clothes from running. I hope I made you laugh, but it is true. So unless he has a health problem suddenly, because he did not initially, then it is a loss of interest. Good luck with it all, don't stress over it, give it your best shot, evaluate after trying, and decide what your next step will be. Stay in touch. Be good to yourself, and remember to be your own best friend.
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