A
male
age
41-50,
*baker
writes:ok i recently posted about my gf and her mum well her mum has used her brains to get her daughter to think she was ok so she could text me. The following thing:I am warning you... dont ever contact my daughter again... she is 19 and does not need a dirty b****** like you... contact her again and I'll go the police...Now this is pathetic! How can a mum say this to her perspective daughter's fella? Me and my gf are together and it's frustrating she's being such a evil and harsh woman. Ok yes there is an age gap, we both now it and we both are prepared for the stick we're going to get from either side but it's for the best, we're strong, just hope her mum comes around, I already have her brother and her dad's blessing. Mum's just being s tough nut. Any suggestions on how to make mum feel less involved in her daughter's affairs? It's her youngest girl so I guess she is just closer to her then the rest.
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (4 December 2009): Hi. You are a bit long in the tooth but as others have said, its all perfectly legal. Are you settled in life? Do you have a good job, money in the bank, own a home? All things that might be expected of you at your age. If you do then i cant see why the mother should be so concerned about you.
If on the other hand, you`re a potless, fast approaching middle aged Peter Pan trying to get down wiv it and hang wiv teenagers, then I can see the mothers concern.
A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (18 November 2009): You and her a both legal adults and both consenting and willing partners who love each other.
It should not matter even for a second what either of your families think at this time.
Text back to the mother that you love her daughter and her daughter loves you. Thats the way things are. She can either accept it or she can back of and let you two live your lives in peace.
Her mother will come around soon enough, when she realises neither of you two will back down and that if she continues as she is, unwilling to accept her duaghter falling in love both legally and completely without immorality, then she, as a mother, will completely lose her daughter.
You two need to stand up to the mother together, united. If she rejects the both of you, then the problem is not yours or your partners. It's her mother's problem to get over her own bigotry.
Flynn 24
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A
male
reader, cbaker +, writes (18 November 2009):
cbaker is verified as being by the original poster of the questioni dont care what her mum thinks of me i know im a decent lad and the reason im with a girl 10 year younger then me is because am still very youthfull i listen to young musin and i do what i was doing back when i was 20 still i live my life young and me and the girl are so happy the mum needs to get to know me but she won talk or meet me i wont reply to her sms cause i dont want to hurt my gf i can be a right pain if i start i want this to woulr out so im giving it every chance to succeed just wish her mum was like the brother and father i know what am doing and so does my gf we have crossed to many bridges as far as am concerned its all good and if it stays that way its only goin to get better
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A
male
reader, grubbyduckling  +, writes (18 November 2009):
Show your girlfriend the text message. It's not her mum's place to intervene, nor should age be the focus of debate. The girl is consensual, you have her brother and father's blessing. The issue is between the girl and her mum. Just wash your hands of it, and ignore insults/threats from the mum. On the other hand, if you hurt the girl, you'll have a really, really, really crazy woman on your hands. So be careful. And be happy!
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (18 November 2009): She's 19... are you 30, or 35?
if you're 30, hmm, no i wouldnt not be too impressed, but if you're closer to 35, i'd feel exactly the same as her mother. I'm sorry, but she's a teenager- you are a grown man, and you should be seeing women your own age, not young girls. I think you need to look at yourself and figure out why in your 30s, you are looking at teenage girls as potential partners. To me as a father, it'd raise questions about your sexual and emotional maturity. Harsh, but that's just the way i feel, and i'm sure her mother feels the same.
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A
male
reader, lazyman87 +, writes (18 November 2009):
regarding the police, age wise you're fine, it's probably just her mum's perception of older men.
as long as you stick to the law and don't rape her i can't see much of a problem. a girl i went to school with married a man older than you.
don't just rely on that whatever you do, you need a few opinions.
good luck.
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