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male
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*ill23
writes: Okay my girlfriend has this ignorant ass best friend who I don't like, she has this problem with speaking to people. She also tried to shit on my mom who helped her ass out when she was out of a job buying her pampers and baby food when she had no money that’s not cool in my book. Now my girl can't see it but she is a straight up user! She only calls my girl when she needs a favor. She went behind her back (hater) to ask her parents what they think about me and my girl being together now what kind of best friend is that. Now I am about to get this apartment and move my girl in but I'm saying, her friend cannot come to my place I mean it. Because when she comes around I get up and leave to be away from her because I don't pretend to like this girl but I am not doing this in my own place. Plus unlike her parents house my place won't be some damn daycare for her 3 kids that she drops off all the time with my girl who is always stuck with them kids. And the part that makes me mad is that my girlfriend tries to force me to speak and be cool with her.
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male
reader, Bill23 +, writes (9 April 2009):
Bill23 is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThanks to all of you for the replies
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (9 April 2009): three kids? how does your girlfriend keep up? Maybe you can play the devious card too. Right now, the best friend is the victim, and you're just spoiling the pity-party. Turn it around on the best friend. Be as nice, as cool as you can be with her (but not as far as having her leave her kids at your apartment) - it might win negotiation points with your gf when she sees that you're trying (which also means not talking about her best friend in a bad light).Don't say that the best friend ABSOLUTELY CANNOT STEP INTO MY APARTMENT EVER! Reason it out with her. Emphasize gently that with your own place you were hoping to be able to spend more time with her or that you were really hoping to wind down with her in the evenings. Canoodle, wheedle, tease, emphasize how many rooms you are going to break in having sex with her. Make her laugh, not resent you. Just emphasize that you want your apartment to be a haven for the BOTH of you.Ultimately you want your girlfriend to start to see the best friend as a drain on her time: if you're playing the innocent, nice guy then maybe your gf will start to realize that you deserve the same amount of attention (if not more) than her best friend. She might even feel guilty about spending time away from you caring for somebody else's kids. If the best friend was allergic to animals, get one for your apartment. Get a big slobbery lovable mongrel (which you would pick with your girlfriend, of course).You'll have to drop the macho act for a while, but when you start communicating and not delivering ultimatums, you might get farther on in your agenda.
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A
female
reader, eyeswideopen  +, writes (9 April 2009):
 Well you can't pick her friends for her but you certainly can have rules for your own house. You definitely don't have to put up with her or her kids at your own place. Just make sure your girl agrees BEFORE she moves in. She will just have to see her friend elsewhere.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (9 April 2009): i think u should talk to ur girlfriend and tell her how u feel exactly..if she loves she is gonna understand !
tell her u cant stand being around her and tell her why ...thats the best thing u can do !
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