A
male
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:My girlfriend wants me to see/date/sleep with other girls. She says she wants me to be sure that I want to be with her, and that she doesn't want to restrict me or drive me away by being jealous or possessive. I love her and want to be with her forever. I dated a lot of girls in the past and don't need to 'experience' other people - I have already done this. It taught me that when I find the right girl I should hold onto her. I have told her all of this and we are planning our future together. At the same time she still wants to have this open relationship, but on my side only - she tells me she has no interest in sleeping with anyone else. How can I convince her that I see this idea as destructive and that I am only interested in her?
View related questions:
jealous Reply to this Question
Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, Babydarlin  +, writes (3 February 2016):
I have said this exact thing to a guy, and it's because I was seeing someone else whom I wanted to keep seeing, so by telling him that I wanted him to see other people to make sure he wanted to be with me was a way to stall. Eventually I wanted to commit to him, but I wasn't ready to give the other guy up
A
female
reader, pastfirst  +, writes (14 January 2009):
 Yeah, I agree with all the other answers here.
She's not ready for a serious, monogamous relationship. She seems very restless. Maybe she feels you're coming on too strong.
Tell her to be honest and to make it clear what she really wants. She seems to be playing some kind of wierd game.
...............................
A
male
reader, Griffo +, writes (14 January 2009):
 Mate, My first thought is honestly I see this as a way out for her, as soon as you do it she'll be off with a guy she's probably been eyeing for a while - a way to make herself feel better. And honesty this is a load of crap!!! How old is she. 16? DO NOT FALL FOR THIS TRAP! What ever you do mate!
On the other hand which I think is VERY unlikely is that she might be exploring her sexuality and considering bisexuality. Where you could be in a situation of having a three way relationship.
AGAIN, I think its all crap and if she truly loved you that much in her heart she would never ever ever come up with some weird solution which is "you are right" very destructive.
I'm sorry if it upsets you but don't fall for it, you will kick yourself. Just talk to her communication is the key and ask her if she still wants to be with you, just tell her thats the way it is and if she does not respect that then its too bad.
Be strong mate and hang in there!
You will thank me later.
...............................
A
reader, anonymous, writes (14 January 2009): I'm sensing she may want an open relationship for her own desires. She claims only on your side, but once you let go and do what she wants, she'll do the same.
You can't get upset with her then if you did it yourself, right?
...............................
A
male
reader, 2old4this +, writes (14 January 2009):
 DANGER DANGER DANGER!!! Im gonna be blunt. There are no good intentions in anything she said. She DEFINITLEY is either seeing someone else or has someone else in mind. I guess it is possible she is hoping you find someone else and leave her so she wont have to break up with you. But personally, Any woman who would say that to me is either crazy or up to no good. And I wouldnt want to be with either one.
...............................
|
