A
male
age
51-59,
anonymous
writes:This is a question for the girls...My g/f likes to go out clubbing with friends. When she does she usually sends me a text message saying that she'll not be home until the morning. Not a problem, but then she switches off her phone... and that drives me nuts!!!I have asked her about it but she says I'm just being paranoid. Am I?
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male
reader, anonymous, writes (27 September 2008): I was in a horrible relationship where we both would turn our phones off when we went out with friends. I know why I turned my phone off and I know why she turned her phone off. We broke up and it was never meant to last. I think you should have enough respect to at least call someone every once in a while to say hello. It's very important to talk after you leave somwhere also. I've lived and learned. If it's someone that you truly love they deserve your respect. I've been with someone else for 2 years since and it has been wonderful. Most our relationship has been long distance (Boston to Charlotte) and we alsways have enough respect to call each other even if we go out. We both come home at resonable times also. Some people just need to be reassured that everything is alright and they are home safely.
A
female
reader, °Ale°  +, writes (13 September 2008):
 Well, you've been given pretty good points. But call me crazy, my cell seems to fit every time I go out, and I also happen to enjoy knowing that my guy misses me every time he texts to say so. But that's just me.
Maybe she's a practical-not very mushy kind of gal.
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A
male
reader, sabbir  +, writes (13 September 2008):
 If you think she truly loves you then dont worry about her. She wouldn't cheat with you. Trust is the most important part of relationship. So, try to make that situation normal. Dont make her feel bad. Might she feels bad that the one she loves who doesnt trust her. That is painful. So, dont hurt yourself and not even her feelings. Talk to her and make it clear. good luck to you. hope everything will be ok.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (13 September 2008): I am in the exact same position as your girlfriend. I go to clubs and parties an average of twice a month without my boyfriend. My boyfriend is paranoid himself, and I am afraid I will never be able to ease his worry.Here is exactly why I leave my cell phone off1) I don't want to carry it with me in the club. Girls often don't have a place to put it because they are wearing dresses or tight jeans, aren't carrying etc. I don't simply don't want to lose it while I am dancing.2) I don't want to waste the battery. Since I don't carry it with me, I leave in in the car. When I return to the car I turn it on, and my messages appear even though it was off. The most I have been able to offer my boyfriend was to call him right after I leave the club, so that he knows I am okay and that communication systems are operating. Sorry, buddy. But you're probably going to lose this battle.
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A
female
reader, quinoa +, writes (13 September 2008):
im a girl and i don't answer the phone when i go clubbing...it's too loud inside to hear, inconvenient to bring the phone along, and i don't want anyone interrupting a good time!
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (13 September 2008): Why does she switch it off completely? What if there was an emergency and you needed to contact her? Why not compromise and ask her to put it on silent.
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A
female
reader, Cielo_Alice +, writes (13 September 2008):
 Hello,
Mostly men are paranoid that's a fact.
And sometimes its ok to feel being paranoid once in a while.
What does your gf do in a club? Do you know any of her friends? You can always go with her to ease your worriness that you are having. And you can always tell her to on her celphone whenever she's with her friends.
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A
female
reader, Sugarbuns  +, writes (13 September 2008):
 You are probably not being paranoid. But how often does she go out clubbing without you? Once every six months? Then it's probably not so much of a concern. But once a week? That could be something entirely different.
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A
female
reader, sappygirl +, writes (13 September 2008):
 you might be. It's hard to carry your phone into clubs because girls have no pocket to put them in. And we hate carrying a purse. She probably turns the phone off to save the battery because she knows she's not going to use it soon. It all comes down to trust. If you trust her, then there shouldn't be a problem. Unless she's given you a reason to think she's being unfaithful, but it's hard to hook up with strangers at a club around your friends who knows you have a boyfriend. That's just my take.
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A
male
reader, saltwater +, writes (13 September 2008):
 I think you are being paranoid.
Maybe she doesn't want to run out of battery in case of an emergency; maybe she doesn't want to accidentally call someone when her phone is in her pocket/bag or whatever.
Why does it drive you nuts? Don't you trust her to have a good time with her friends?
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