A
male
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:Me and my girlfriend (I'm 23 and she's 20) have been together for over two years. We're serious, Things are wonderful between us two, we really love each other, and we're living together since a couple of weeks ago. The other day we were talking about fantasies and she told me that she'd been fantasising about having a threesome with another female. She asked me if we could have one, to which I agreed. Her best friend is ok when the idea too, and I first I was so excited and willing to do it. But after thinking seriously about it, I changed my mind. The thought of my girlfriend with another girl makes me feel jealous, although I always liked the idea of a threesome and i’m not going to lie, I fantasize a lot about seeing two girls together. But now we're talking about my girlfriend, not any random girl. I can't help myself but to think that it would really anger me to see my girlfriend being pleasured by this girl. I know they are almost like sisters, but what if my girlfriend gets jealous during it too? I think that is a dangerous idea. I'm afraid that by doing this it might ruin our relationship. But on the other hand a part of me would really like to do it. I realize that a threesome may be a once in a lifetime opportunity. I don’t know what to do.
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best friend, jealous, threesome Reply to this Question
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male
reader, BigCuz  +, writes (15 January 2015):
The idea that she suggested it is a red flag, with her best friend & the friend agreed..what are they already doing, thats the question. If you decided against it, would your girl be open to it with the best friends partner, another question. Your situation would be different if you all were casual friends, but it seems you two are playing house or aiming towards a committed relationship, you've both crossed the fantasy line by approaching the friend, it may be their trying to get you to come around, you two have already crippled the relationship, Do it & leave if you truly wanna have a threesome, if you don't do it, u should still leave, trust issues & jealousy never made a relationship work, a problem you have right now, it's obvious
A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (14 January 2015): When I was about 18-19 , I was in a long term relationship with a women I absolutely loved I felt she was the most amazing thing ever .I used to work away from where I live ( just out of the city ) And well I used to talk to a lot of girls ( a sales job) and well there was a lot of chances arose where I could of easily had flings and had a bit of fun but I did not , I did not want to ruin something special and my mates used to say to me ' you will regret this when you are older' but I did believe them.anyway 4 years into the relationship my partner ended up cheating on me and well I am only 26 but already regretting doing it .My story is different as it would of been cheating but now them opportunities I had back then hardly come back.. so take advantage while you can if not you will regret it in 10 years time. good luck though
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (14 January 2015): TBF .... ok it may end up ruining the relationship but at the same time you are at a age where couples do not last ( well a higher percentage dont ) simply because we are younger and still finding out things about ourself s .when I was at your age I would not of done it simply because I would not want to ruin things with my girl .But now being older .. I would take the chance ..not many girls would propose such a thing so it would be good to take advantage of it .It could be the story of how you did get a threesome as opposed to nearly got a threesome :) Its up to you though but as I said not many relationships last at young ages .. but that's my sceptical view
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A
female
reader, Honeypie +, writes (14 January 2015):
 A fantasy like that can SOUND great and LOOK great IN your imagination, in reality it rarely live up to the hype.
If you have doubts, don't do it. Role play instead with each other.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (14 January 2015): Tell your girlfriend about how you feel. It seemes like the two of you have quite a thing going there, if she really loves you she will understand. Explain to her exactly how you feel and what the consequences could be if something went wrong. Make sure she fully understands your opinion.
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A
female
reader, Sincerely Yours +, writes (14 January 2015):
 You are a rare kind of smart. It's admirable how you proactively protect your girlfriend and yours feelings. You are right to be worried. If it goes wrong, it will probably not be worth the risk.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (14 January 2015): Dont do it. It will destroy your relationship plus if you are already having doubts then it means it isnt a good idea. Just because it is a fantasy it doesnt mean you should make it happen. I dont know why people do threesomes personally, I find it disgusting. Best wishes
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A
female
reader, Midnight Shadow  +, writes (14 January 2015):
 Personally, I think fantasies are usually best left as that; they rarely live up to the idea you have of them and can even cause break ups. I also wouldn't suggest ever introducing a friend either of you would like to keep into your sex life; it's notorious for ending friendships.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (13 January 2015): If you feel it "might effect your relationship?"
You're right! It's a common fantasy. It doesn't work for everyone.
If there is any doubt, it's best to do without! Tell her you want to keep the relationship exclusive, and you've had a change of heart.
Once you open that door, it will never close again. It's best to keep some things in our imaginations. You shouldn't tamper with something that is working. That's how you mess things up.
Monogamous relationships don't always withstand intrusions from third sex-partners. It's the "after-thought" that always gets to people. The morning-after regret.
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A
female
reader, WhenCowsAttack +, writes (13 January 2015):
The best friend thing is a REALLY bad idea if you're going to do it. It is also a bad idea if you are not both 100% certain. I would back out if I were you.
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A
female
reader, person12345 +, writes (13 January 2015):
 Just because you agreed to it initially doesn't mean you're obligated to go through with it. Once you go through with it, those images of what happened will be in your brain forever. There's no going back. If you're feeling jealous now, imagine how it will feel after it happened. For monogamous couples I generally think threesomes are a kiss of death. I think it's smart to back out now. A lot of fantasies are really best left as fantasies.
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