A
male
age
30-35,
*idnt even know
writes:9 months ago I was dating a girl Jessica, who I really liked, I go to college out of state and I'm not home alot. One weekend while I was home we were at a party and we got into a huge fight. A don't remember much about it but I know I said some pretty nasty stuff. She left that night and wouldn't return my calls or texts.When I went to her place her parents told me to leave and not bother her. I went back to school and moved on. A few months later I heard rumors that she was pregnant and when I asked her she said no. On new years eve my mom called me and said that Jes had was in lobour and wnted to know what was going on. I was at a new years eve party when my mom called but I left and got to the hospital as soon as I could only to be met by her father yelling at me saying I abandoned his pregnant daughter and then showed up drunk for the delivery. In the end I ended up getting kicked out of the hospital. Yesterday Jessica called me and said she was sorry for everything , I went over to her house and final got to see my son, but as soon as her family came home , her dad started yelling at me and tellign em to leave. And that he would have me thrown in jail if I ever showed up again . What can i do
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reader, anonymous, writes (28 February 2010): How did you resolve your situation? Please update us.
A
female
reader, Angzw  +, writes (4 January 2010):
Because of the complexity of the situation, try diplomacy first. No need to start an unnecessary war. Ask your parents to make an appointment to go see the baby; after all its their grandchild too. Then while your parents are there, they can talk to her parents separately and explain to them that you didn't know anything about it and they can confirm with Jess. Your father should also suggest a paternity test to get things back on track. After that try arrange visitation with Jess, just the two of you. If this continues to be a problem then let her know gently that you are being forced to go the legal route which will waste time and money that could be spent on the baby. But because she didn't tell you, I would insist on a paternity test to make sure its yours. If it was yours why would she tell her parents who the father is, but not the actual father? If all else fails then consult a lawyer/family court.
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A
female
reader, stella-confused/angry  +, writes (4 January 2010):
get a law suit custody is the best say Jessica told you that she wasnt pregnant and all you want is to get to see your own son after all his got your blood too say to the judge that you dont want full custody but you want to be able to see hom 5 times a week and that you 2 take turns keeping him for every holiday . xxx stella-confused/angry
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