A
male
,
anonymous
writes: I feel most of the time when im with my girlfriend (of 1 year) I have too put on an act. Im not a loud hyperactive speaking person and just say it as it is. But my girlfriend is the opposite and when im not jumping up and down over somthing she is talking about she notices and asks if im alright. It really gets annoying.I find my girlfriend at times fairly boring too talk too, as she talks about nothing most of the time. If I just answer like 'yeah' she notices and says im in a mood.I really find it annoying.She doesn't really have hobbies apart from shopping a lot and spening money. I have a few hobbies which don't interest her. I feel she has no motiviation. I feel if we did more we would have better things too talk about etc. Any one else think so?Thanks ...
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female
reader, Reebe +, writes (6 January 2007):
By "high maintenance" i just meant she didn't sound very easy going, as for the pajama thing it's good that she feels comfortable enough to do that. Maybe suggest days where one time you plan something to do and another time she plans something, doesn't have to be expensive it could just be as you say going for a long walk or maybe to the cinema?
A
female
reader, sweetiegirl +, writes (5 January 2007):
people look not every relationship is a fairy tail there are somedays when even ,e and my boyfriend don't even talk to each other very much but it doesn't mean that we don't love each other, it's just that we see each everyday and we talk all the time sometimes slience is a blessng lol no but you don't need to have a lot of things in common with your b/f or g/f cause that's sometimes what makes the relationship interesting learning about the other person like and dislike and hobbys, and just b/c this guy thinks that his g/f gets a annoying sometimes go ask any married couple how many times they really didn't pay attention to what the other one said, you'll be suprized.
sweetie
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (5 January 2007): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThanks for all your replies. Much appreciated. We do have a lot of fun together, but as none of us can drive yet we find it hard too do things. I like the outdoors and would love too go on big long walks with my girlfriend, but she is fairly quite lazy and doesn't want too.
I feel that now she is 'too relaxed' she prefers it if I go too her house instead of mine and when I go she is not dressed, and im pjamas or a dressing gown. For most of the night she just lays on her bed half asleep. And im just thinking, 'i want too get out and do somthing'.
What do you mean by high maintainence?
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A
female
reader, Reebe +, writes (5 January 2007):
You 2 seem pretty incompatable.
She seems to demand a lot of attention from you and thats not fun for either of you.
She is what some people would call "high maintenance" which after a year and can understand why it's getting weary.
Try to encourage her to get some interests of her own. If things don't change soon I'd think about finishing with her you don't seem to have much fun together.
Good Luck!
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A
female
reader, Nikita +, writes (5 January 2007):
I agree with Shandypop. It doesnt sound like you have a lot in common. You appear to be complete opposites and while that is not always a bad thing, you do need to find some common ground in order to make this work. Ask her what she likes doing, apart from shopping. maybe you can find something that you both like. There are thousands of activities out there. maybe you'll find one that you can both participate in. If this doesnt work and she's not interested you may have to ask yourself if she's right for you. good luck.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (5 January 2007): Er why are you too together? What do you like about her? What does she like about you? if you don't have anything in common after one year then the rest of your lives look pretty boring. Encourage her to get some hobby going, is there nothing that you two could do together. Me and my blokes are into Hot Rod cars, we have one each and get out there and drive them. There must be something. Life is too short. Look at life and decide if you really want to stay with her.
Take care
xx
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A
female
reader, sweetiegirl +, writes (5 January 2007):
Sit her down and talk to her one night right after she says "are you alright" and tell her that you love hearing her voice and love knowing what she has to say and how her day went, but you are not the type of person who just as you said it jumps up and down over alot of things. But never the less doesn't mean that i don't find what you have to say interesting. so please when you stop and ask me if everything is alright, it is alright i just don't show alot of emotion, so anytime you feel like you have to ask if everything is alright you don't have to at all, i trust and love you enough to tell you when something is wrong.
Now that hopefully takes care of that for you it tells her you love her and that you are interested and that you want her to stop asking with out coming off as a @$$hole.
Now if after you say that to her and say the next day she does it again then just say quietly and politely " hunn what did we talk about "INSERT DAY" I told you I will tell you if something is wrong, and i am ok everything is perfect "and make sure you tell her everything is perfect" give her a kiss and go about doing what you were doing.
And yeah simmilar activites would give you more to talk about just make sure that it is something you both agree on.
Hope that helps and let me know if that helped with an update.
sweets
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