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My girlfriend doesn't like making out!

Tagged as: Dating, Teenage<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (30 July 2009) 10 Answers - (Newest, 23 May 2011)
A male Australia age 30-35, *nonymous_jp writes:

hey guys

im 17 and my girlfriend is 14 and she thinks making out is gross. im not sure if its a maturity thing or she had a bad experience or what, i know for sure she has hooked up before, i don't know how much but i know its hasn't been much at all but she said she was forced to do so it probably was a bad experience.

i really want to be able to make out with my girlfriend but i don't want to push her and i want her to actually want to make out. if that makes sense.

we've been going out for 4 weeks and we haven't even kissed, though shes been grounded for the last 2 weeks and i wasn't allowed to see her but still.

what can i do in this situation?

ive considered dumping her but i'm too attached, even after only 2 weeks of seeing her and shes crazy about me too.

thanks for any help.

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A male reader, anonymous, writes (23 May 2011):

hey this is the original poster.

turns out that girl just liked her ex the whole time, very immature. funnily enough i found a girl 2 weeks later that was a few months older (i thought she was older before we went out!) and i have been with her for nearly 2 years now. im 19 in 2 months, shes 17 in december. im at her dads place but i normally live at her mums. im part of her family and its awesome!!! so age isnt too much a factor when your intentions are moralistic. but of course some age differences are just a definite no go. i say 14 and 17 is fine, i have the best relationship out of all my friends and i love this girl with all my heart. im glad i dont have stupid issues like this any more

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A female reader, LAdiiSuPahSt4r Guyana +, writes (22 May 2011):

LAdiiSuPahSt4r agony auntOh , Hey how did your relationship work out ? ,

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A male reader, anonymous_jp Australia +, writes (31 July 2009):

anonymous_jp is verified as being by the original poster of the question

is that the same for australia? im pretty sure ive never heard that before. im only 2 and a half years older btw

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A female reader, LAdiiSuPahSt4r Guyana +, writes (30 July 2009):

LAdiiSuPahSt4r agony auntwee all understand yuu are don't want to push her into anythinq. But she is 14 !!!! And technically you are breakinq the law for being MUCH older. so think about it . And do the right thing

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A male reader, anonymous_jp Australia +, writes (30 July 2009):

anonymous_jp is verified as being by the original poster of the question

ive told her im not going to rush her into anything that shes not ready for like her ex did. i dont even think she knows what shes ready for, shes brought up the idea of sex with me even, and i told her to take it slow. but you're probably right, she's not ready for what i am. i guess ill have to be patient, probably should've thought twice about going out with a 14 year old i get that but i didn't really know what i was in for. thank you, some constructive points, some not so.

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A female reader, lostinit United States +, writes (30 July 2009):

i understand that youre confused. i, too, am 14, but i love the thought of making out. :) but, she is only 14, and is probably afraid that if she gives in to making out with you, that you will try tto push her to do more things like have sex... talk to her about it. communication is key. make sure that she understands that u dont want sex right now (even if u do, she doesnt need to know)... hope this helps! xoxo- lostinit

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A reader, anonymous, writes (30 July 2009):

well this could be a number of things. For one, since you are much older than her, she may think that a simple kiss will lead into something more that she isnt ready to do yet. It also could be that she feels she may not kiss well enough to satisfy a seventeen year old. Think back to when you were fourteen, im sure you werent the best kisser. Youre still a kid at that age. I think that the best way to handle this is to sit down and have a talk with your girlfriend and find out the true reason then assure her not to worry.

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A female reader, Honeypie United States +, writes (30 July 2009):

Honeypie agony auntMaybe the FACT that she is 14 should tell you she might not be ready for the same things you are.... She is still a kid.

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A female reader, LAdiiSuPahSt4r Guyana +, writes (30 July 2009):

LAdiiSuPahSt4r agony auntummm ; well for one [ your 17 and she is 14 ] she is probably just scared of the fact you are much older and mature and that your going to expect more from her. [ soo basically ; in her mind she thinks you want too much and she is scared of what might happen when she makes out with you ] && boy when you turn 18 this girl is going to be 15. evah think about that

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (30 July 2009):

maybe think about asking her what she likes, it may simply be that she's not ready to or maybe she hasn't liked it in the past personally i used to hate kissing but i was open and honest and we found a way to make it work and now. At the end of the day she's 14 and may be feeling a bit intimidated because you're 17 and she thinks you're experienced or doesn't feel confident enough. Just support her and stick it out you will get there in the end good luck xxx

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