A
male
age
30-35,
*arvinc980
writes:My girlfriend attacked me when leaving a bar. I was at the bar celebrating my good friend, who happens to be my girlfriends(ex) brother, and we were having a great time. Well, after bar hoping we end up at a bar and my girlfriend and i get into an argument. She says things to hurt you but i know its only cause shes hurting. I know she doesn't mean them... shes just a bitch as i am a bit of a jack ass. I whole heartedly love her. She's been through a horrible childhood with being molested and abused. As was I. We both are adopted and I feel like that is why we connect so much. We Never felt loved until we met eachother.she has a beautiful 16mo old who calls me dad and i treat as my son even though he is not. I love him just as much if not more then i love her. I've know her for a very long time as shes my friends older sister... but we really started dating when she was 3mos pregnant. We both quit drinking and settled down and have a nice life... Great jobs, and nothing could more more perfect until now. Here Is the Problem... sorry had to give a little history and rant.One comment led to another and i told her "fuck you no one wants your stretch marks anyways." i then proceeded to walk out of the bar. That was completely out of line i deserved a slap... especially since i think she is the most beautiful woman in the world.As i was leaving the bar someone shoved me from behind and before i could turn around to see who it was i was getting pushed by one person and choked by another and we all went to the floor. I had originally thought it was her brother who attacked me from behind like a bitch but after her texted me a few times today i guess she got hit in the mix too... and now i think it was her who attacked me. i have choke marks on my neck and claw marks on my back. All I KNOW IS whoever attacked me first got punched and left blood all over my clothes. I thought it was her brother.. i was in the marine corps for 4 years and it was just instinct. I took down whoever came behind me to attack me. I'm pretty sure it was both of them... i thought i was hitting her brother but i'm afraid i hurt him and my girlfriend... o rnow ex.What do i do? i'd never hit a woman. I've gotten in fights for gusy hitting women. Instinct just took over and now every thing is ruined. me beating her brother was enough to ruin it... but if i accidently hurt her too... that weighs so heavy on my shoulders i cannot handle it.
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female
reader, tennisstar88 +, writes (18 September 2010):
 And the cops weren't called on this one? Surprising, well your relationship doesn't sound very healthy if you're saying nasty remarks like that to her and her getting extremely physical with you. Her brother didn't need to get involved, the fight is between you and her. But I do understand he was defending his sister. Did they come to the bar to join the festivities or was she looking to pick a fight?
If she came uninvited looking to pick a fight with you then she needs to apologize first for having her brother attack you and for adding her unnecessary 50 cents to the fight. Women know you never ever get involved in a fight between two men because you're liable to get hit. She must have missed that memo. After she apologizes then you need to apologize for you hurtful remarks. You're not an abusive guy, you were just using self defense and she was an idiot for jumping in the middle of it. So either wait for her to apologize, or be the bigger person and apologize for your hurtful words..that's all you need to apologize for. The rest was hers and brother's fault. Lastly, I would rethink this relationship between you two..i
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