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male
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*watt1962
writes: a couple of days ago i caught my girlfriend of 4 years, cheating with another man. it was friday night, she went out with her friend to a bar. she called me around 2:20 am and said she was on her way to my house, just down the street from my apartment.around 3:30am she still had not shown up, i drove down the street and found her car parked next to a truck across the street from the bar she was at.the guy was on top of her. i reacted with a great deal of anger, but i did leave without any violence, but the hurt that i feel cannot be described in words. i feel so empty inside and betrayed. it is the worst feeling of my life. i did everything for her and took her for her word when she told me she loved me. how do i get over the hurt and resist the tempation to go back with her?
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male
reader, beenditched  +, writes (31 May 2007):
I've just been cheated on by a girl that i love and it is the worse feeling that i've ever felt, i really feel for you mate. I found out the girl i love had been seeing a guy behind my back for a couple of months before i found out, i too refrained from using violence and i believe that it showed that i was more of a man, i could have killed the guy in question but what would it have proven? What i did was kept my dignity and walked away and that is what you did and you should be proud of this!! When dealing with the girl in my case i told her how much she hurt me and refrained from using any bad language and i haven't had any contact since, it has driven me to near suicide although i'm starting to just except that she has gone(2 months). You must walk away for your own sanity!! You must realise that she wasn't who you thought she was !! And finally you can never trust her ever again!! you caught her this time but how many other times has she done this?? Walk away and you'll get a girl that will love you, you can't go back with her as she is fake and you'll never believe a word she says ever again.leave her behind, its hard but its for the best. I wish you the best of luck mate, pm me if you want someone to talk to mate.
A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (2 April 2007): NO, cheaters never change. i have been cheated on 3 times with my last gf, don't do it.
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (7 February 2006): its not about resisting the temptation, if there is temptation there must still be feelings, more than likely love over lust. I have been on both sides of the fence. I cheated on my boyfriend, we had been together for 2years. I didnt mean to, it was a friendship that went too far, but i am deeply sorry and we worked thru it, and now 2mnths later we are still together and getting back to the way things used to be. Also my ex of 5yrs cheated on me. My heart was broken but i knew i loved him and i gave him a chance to prove he loved me, we spent lots of hapy times together. it didnt work out in the end but at least we can say we tried. Have you spoken to her since? It might have been a drunken mistake, we are only human. Just take some time out for yourself, think about what you wan and talk it over. x
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (6 February 2006): I don't think you should go back with her at all. You don't cheat on someone you really love. I was cheated on as well and was told about it 2 years after the fact. We were still hanging out with the other person. How would you feel if you found out your gf messed around with a friend you hung out with and sit there like a fool not knowing about it???? Move on. There are other women with better values out there that will appreciate your love and honesty. In turn, she will give it back.
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female
reader, Aunty Nah +, writes (3 February 2006):
well i rally think that if u really loved her and she did u 2 then maybe it can be saved. I am exactly in your shoes except 4 i was the cheater...i didn't mean 2 it just happened in a way but it wasn't coz i didnt love my boyf...just a tough time we were goin thru and it happnd. i really want him back but he's 2 proud as he thinks that maybe i'll do it again...or if he does come back i'll think he's a walkover or something. I think that u should really ask urself if she's the 1, is it that ur used 2 her and can't stand not bein with her or do u honestly know that if u get back with her there's no solid future and u'll both be wastin eachother's time? If u really still love her and r positive u still want her then find out what it was that made her turn 2 another man...and if u fell u r capable of puutin it in the past and saving ur relationship then it's well worth it and don't let pride get in the way of something special.
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male
reader, lifereal +, writes (31 January 2006):
 Hi...Just a few things to consider if you should succumb to the temptation to go back to her,I believe that if there is a legitimate reason to break a relationship it is this sort of thing,notice your trust has been violated if you should go back to her what kind of a relationship is it going to be without trust,consider also the HIV/AIDS Scourge,such behaviour puts you at risk,despite all your investment into this relationship if not because of it, I say dear friend be brave and walk away,no remedy for the hurting heart except the fact that you are the innocent one you did your best,you took her at her word, you loved her,and you walked away without violence,the anger is only too uderstandable.A few tips on succesfully breaking away from someone you loverealise it wil hurt it will be painfulsay the word with as much respect as is possiblereturn everything of her to avoid excusses for her coming over.get back everything of yours from her place for the same reason.after you have broken up avoid calling each other or putting yourself in situations as though you are still together.if you can avoid places you frequented together,things like the songs you liked together should also be avoided this helps to ease the pain from memorieskeep these conditions for some time until you feel strong enough then you may resume contact if it's necessary,it's hard but necesary I consider reconciliation under the present circumstances unwise,all the best
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