A
female
age
26-29,
anonymous
writes:It's been a year since, i guss you could call it a fling ended. For the first 6 months I couldn't really talk to any guys let alone flirt, now it seems i can't stop flirting, but i'm not at all attracted or want anything to happen between the guys i flirt with. My friends openly call me a slut because I've kissed a few guys, and the majority of them haven't kissed a guy. I'm 16 by the way (my friends are all quite innocent). I haven't had sex with any body but my friends openly discuss that they think now i'm 16 i'll just go with anyone (they do it in a jokey way), which i wont cause i can't stand the thought of being with anyone physically except for said asshole that broke my heart - even though i dont want him anymore (he's off at uni having sex with anything that has a nice pair of legs legs). But it really upsets me. I feel even worse when guys that I've kissed try and make things into a relationship. I tell myself i wont do it anymore, but then it'll happen again :S worst of all, if we're out with a group of friends, my friends will take picture of my cuddling/kissing these guys and post them on facebook, i immediately untag myself because i dont want said asshole to see but i know everyone at school can see them. As well, i don't dress like a slut, usually i wear jeans with a long sleeved high necked tops whereas all my friends wear short skirts and high heels :S what do I do? help? my friends are really nice and great when they are not calling me a slut and i dont want to loose them. i know this was long, sorry :(
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female
reader, Honeypie  +, writes (17 October 2011):
 Flirting doesn't make you a slut. We have all kissed a few frog in our life, it doesn't make anyone a slut. But with that said, understand that your actions (flirting and kissing mindlessly) makes other judge you and your character - so you can either cool it down a tad or ingore what people think/say.
So tell your friend to quit with the slut comment, tell them it hurts your feelings. They are friends after all.
A
female
reader, charliesdevil73 +, writes (16 October 2011):
 First of all, you are not a slut by any means. Maybe you shouldn't be running around kissing a bunch of guys, but you are not a slut. You need to tell these "friends" of yours that you don't appreciate it when they call you that name. They are not helping your self image after your break up, they may even be making it go down.
Second, who cares if your ex knows you are kissing other guys. It serves him right to see that you can be with other people. And if he gets upset, too bad. He broke your heart so let him get upset.
And lastly, I have been in similar situations before. Life goes on and you eventually meet someone better. I have had my heart broken twice and both times I felt like I didn't want any other man but the one that just broke my heart. When you really care about someone, sometimes it is hard to see their flaws. I didn't date for almost two years after the second heartbreak and then I met my husband. So, just remember "Men are like toads. You have to do a lot of kissing before you meet your handsome prince".
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A
female
reader, fi_the_tree +, writes (16 October 2011):
 Tell them to stop calling you a slut, if they're true friends they'll realise how much it's upsetting you and should stop. As for going round kissing guys, i would try and stop doing that.
Why would you not want 'said asshole' (as you put it) to see pics of you with other guys anyway??? You said it yourself, he's off sleeping with anything with a nice pair of legs anyway, if he tries to have a go at you about it you can just laugh at him and tell him to 'jog on' (but not so politely if you know what i mean)
Believe it or not, this is what needs to be done since you had your heart broken...go out and have fun! So what if you kiss a couple of guys, we make mistakes, and we move on. Trust me, your friends will all end up doing the same at some stage in their lives!!! Live everyday like it's your last, life is far far far too short...
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