A
female
age
30-35,
*lwaysnight
writes: My best friend is having a real life crisis!Any help would be really appreciated.Her brother was helping their dad link his emails to his phone. When doing this he found that their dad has a profile on a sex website. (Where people message each other to meet up...). The messages date back to at least a year. He is a married man, with a family relying on him. The messages specifically say that he is married and discretion is a must.The dilemma is, should she and her brother confront her father, or tell her mother or what?
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female
reader, alwaysnight +, writes (7 October 2014):
alwaysnight is verified as being by the original poster of the questionJust an update -
I posted on here on her behalf, as she didnt know what to do.
I personally have no advice for her (never been in this situation) and I wont be getting involved in their matters!
Shes completely torn - had to go to the doctors today and been sent home from work. She has said she cannot live with the lie and therefor has chosen to ask her dad. Ive told her to be careful...I cant do much else.
A
female
reader, So_Very_Confused +, writes (6 October 2014):
third vote for STAY OUT OF THEIR MARRIAGE.
as the adult child of a man who cheated on his wife (my mom) and a married woman with adult children... I will tell you that from both sides CHILDREN whether adult or not, have NO SAY in what goes on between their parents.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (6 October 2014): I wouldn't offer any advice.
Let the kids decide how they want to handle it.
Personally, if I was the mom, I would want to know.
Just being on that site constitutes cheating in my book, but that is just me.
It could be the mom already knows or suspects something is gong on. You don't really know nor do the kids.
But do stay out of it. It is a family matter.
Be there for them, but don't give advice as the other posters here have said as well.
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A
male
reader, olderthandirt +, writes (6 October 2014):
Tg a "midlife crisis and wishing he were young again which is not going to happen.Confroning him will be explosive because he will feel his pivavacy was invaded( technically true) and telling them other will cause pain for her. Ergo, I don't see any 'upside' to either of those two alternatives, There is always the do nothing alternative which in this case I would opt for. Wish them luck and have them be ready to support the mom if it all goes south.
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A
female
reader, eyeswideopen +, writes (6 October 2014):
Totally agree with Honeypie, absolutely stay out of this business. There may come a day they will resent you for just knowing about it (even though your best friend told you herself). Do not give any advice or input into the situation. Just let them figure out what they think is the right thing to do. If you value your friendship you will just be the shoulder not the voice.
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A
female
reader, Honeypie +, writes (6 October 2014):
Wanting to cheat (as in signing up) and actually cheating is not always the one and the same.
He might be unhappy in his marriage and fantasize about a fling. And he might be a full fledged cheater.
I would NOT get involved with their family issues. Let them decide what is right for them.
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