A
female
age
36-40,
* lana x
writes:i went out with this guy for 8 months like a year ago now, but we have been on and off since last june, but recently one of my mates told me that he liked her... we have been mates for ages, and she has been with her bf for a year and a half, so she told me that she didnt like him, and i beleive her because she wouldnt risk her bf and our friendship for him. but also, my best mate text the same guy sayin that she liked him when she knew how much i still liked him, and thought that we had a chance of getting back together. he text her back saying that he liked her but when i asked him about it he said he was drunk both times he told my mates... but the thing is, hes done it before.i dont know whether to be annoyed at the lad or at my best mate for going against the friend rule and telling him that she likes him... i know my ex sounds a bit of a man slag but he really aint.
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female
reader, x lana x +, writes (26 January 2007):
x lana x is verified as being by the original poster of the question heyy, thanks for that, i have someone knew, but he finds out i do and he comes back onto the scene, me and him have an on off relationship, he always tells me that he still loves me and shiz, but he doesn'y its all just a big lye to get me back into bed, but every time i fall for it.
i know my mate isnt a real mate but its hard not coping in college life without her... she doesn't know that i know she likes him, so i have to act normal round her,
as for the lad... ive tried not haviong him in my life, but he wil email me or text me. its just hard to move on because he meant sooooo much to me. its like when yopur with him he makes things seem so small and he is always there for me... also when i'm with him all the old feelings come back, he has a way with words so you always beleive him. but when i aint with him i can see him for who he really is. oooo i just don't know.
my new boyfriend though he is great! he has his own person like this so we can relate with each other, and have complete trust in each other. thanks x x x
A
reader, anonymous, writes (26 January 2007): Stop.
Why do you like someone who can downplay his actions and words and why would you feel the need to protect him? He's a big guy and can take care of himself.
It sounds like you are all too young and wrapped up in your own worlds. This whole ME ME ME that is becoming more intrusive with people's moral centres. This message of self interest and how to exaggerate it will have a whole slew of narcissistic individuals walking about wrecking havoc on others.
Anyways...
I say...don't puruse the Ex as you KNOW from experience that he has done this before, I assume cheating so why choose to have your heartbroken? Be smart and show some repsect for yourself. He isn't no great prize.
As for the mate...well, she may be someone you can relate to on some levels but this doesn't make her quality friend material now does it?
Don't confuse you perceive her as a good friend with her being friendly towards you. BIG DIFFERENCE.
Just move on and work on finding someone who is more intune with what you want from a partner and find someone who shares common life goals and values as this is what will find you with someone who understands what it means to love another and treat them as you would like to be treated.
Yah know?
Best Wishes.
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