A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:im 18/f hes 19/m okay so i really like my bestfriend, alot. and for the last 6 or so months we've been extremely close. he got out of a 5 year relationship 7 months ago, and he wants to enjoy singledom. but at the same time he told me of this mystery girl that he has significant feelings for, and how hes scared to tell her how he feels...he doesnt want to make another mistake like his ex, but he wants to be with this mystery girl so badly. The thing is, about two months ago a mutual friend of ours, told me that he confessed to her that i was in fact the mystery girl and he was going to explain everything to me in person. however, that day never came...The thing is, he went on tour with his band for a month and i wasnt able to see him, so ill be seeing him for the first time since tour this coming monday. and during that time, i began to stress and worry that maybe he had developed feelings for one of the girls that went on tour with them. I felt threatened by this, so i decided to just try and get over him... but of course that didnt work. haha. we have sexted before, a couple of times. and usually in the past with guys ive sexted with i never was really that turned on by it, but with him im extremeeely turned on. We havent had sex or anything btw, im still a virgin. we have kissed once when we were drunk but that was it. so two nights ago, me and the guy i like were skyping for legit 4 hrs and 38 mins, and he was being like rediculously cute...like more so then usual. like constantly telling me how cute i look and i even mentioned how "i want to be taylor momsen" and hes like "no.. stay you :3 " and it was really cute. and he was telling me how he has all these requests on skype from people but im the only one he uses it for, so he doesnt accept them.. and he was saying how he wants to take me to this mountain one day and whatnot, and wants me to go with him to this gig coming up. So i was pretty certain after that convo that perhaps i am still the mystery girl he likes. but then we hopped off and went to bed, but we were texting each other..and well things got a little bit complicated. we started off with him saying something really cheesy to me haha. but he knows i love cheesy stuff and then he full asks me out of the blue "so hows your love life? any new boys on the mind or in the life?" and i was like stunned... like i couldnt tell him it was him and i was freaking out.. so i was just like "wouldnt you like to know haha kidding haha you know me im pretty hopeless telling if anyone likes me or not haha so im just waiting to see what happens what about you lovely? hows things with the mystery girl?" him: "im still not saying anything about her to anyone. how did you know there was somebody though im just seeing what happens cause i dont want to make a mistake. its kinda hard resisting though =/ sounds lame i know :c" me: "your formspring haha. dw it doesnt sound lame it sounds adorable i dont wanna make a mistake either, and im petrified ill ruin it somehow and trust me im bursting at the seams wanting to tell him...but im waiting to see if he tells me first. #nowwhoselame haah"him: "i thought you said you didnt have anyone :S im just hoping she likes me when im ready. sucks though...i want her so bad. but at the same time im not ready for it again...and im afraid someone will come and take her before i get the chance :c but if that happens ill know it wasnt meant to be i guess.." me: "i do..i like him alot....i dont think he knows...part of me really wants to tell him...a big part of me hopes that he catches on and tells me first...im worried he'll find someone else, and it sounds selfish but i dont even want to think about him ending up with anyone else...and if he does then it just wasnt meant to be. but deep inside me, as silly as it sounds...i have this undeniable feeling that we will take the risk...and it will be the risk that we were thankful we took" him: "aww okay. looks like were in the same sorta situation then ahah. im not gonna tell her for a while though. i just wanna see how shit goes first" me: "what happens if she tells you she likes you first?" him: "i dunno really. im just not ready and i dont know right now ahha. sounds stupid i know. but i would rather be the one to tell her anyway. and if shes still around when i decide im ready then awsome. if not, well then it wasnt suposed to work i guess..."danni" josh she'd be an idiot if she ever left, shes a very lucky girl" him: " well no not left...but like...found someone else. cause i havent told her. and i dont plan on it for a while.. i just wanna see how shit goes and find out more about her first and stuff =/ and no...im not even going to tell YOU who it is" me: "if she likes you too, she wont even notice or end up with anyone else ahaha your gay! i want to knowwww" him" I guess.. but some things change.. like i dont know if she will or wont. i wanna find out more about her first. thats why when i like a girl i wait ages to see what shes like, if she causes fights, if shes into other guys n shit.i wanna make sure" me: "theres nothing wrong with that at all she must be doing okay if you still like her haha! i have a really good feeling for you about this, like it'll work out for you, no matter how long it takes "him:" i hope so, i wish i was ready cause i wanna tell her so bad right now. but i dunno i just need my single time to be a douchey single kid i guess. THAT sounds stupid n shit. but after 5 years i need it i think. i could be wrong, but im going to try it out anyway" me: "im sure shes dying to tell you too! haha doesnt sound stupid, it makes sense. i know quite a few people who have done the single bit for a while after getting out of a relationship, it helped them figure out if the single life is for them or not. everything will work out. you deserve to be happy "him:" yeah i guess i need to figure that out haha. pretty sure it will be a relationship life because i cant 'get girls' for shit. haha"me:" josh you could get anyone you want. and if your should choose to be in a relationship with mystery girl it should be cause you want to, not cause you cant get girls haah. but you'll figure it out "i dont think mystery girl is me anymore after that conversation and now its just weird... like i wasnt turned on at all this morning when we were sexty texting just knowing that he likes some other girl.. and saying how "she doesnt have to know about it. she doesnt even know i like her. no body knows about her except my brother" and now i cant even say anything cute to him with out him being like "shouldnt you be saying that to your man" etc etc and he got pretty pissy at me thinking that it was kellin quinn or shawn milke, but i had to explain to him that they're celeb crushes. not my legit crush. im seeing him on monday....and now i feel all weird cause im not the girl he likes, and i dont know how to answer him if he asks about the guy i like... i just really dont know what to think right now :(
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crush, drunk, her ex, his ex, still a virgin, text Reply to this Question
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, HoneyEyedLatina  +, writes (16 May 2011):
 You are very welcome!
A
reader, anonymous, writes (15 May 2011): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionthanks so much for the advice ahha! yes i'll keep you updated :) x
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A
female
reader, HoneyEyedLatina +, writes (14 May 2011):
This is was the most interesting post that I've read today. To me it sounds like he is talking about you. The reason why he is so hesitant in telling you is because he wants to enjoy being single before he jumps into another relationship. Plus he wants to be sure that you are good girlfriend material. I'm pretty sure he knows that you know but he is just not ready to tell you but at the same time it sounds like he doesn't want you give up on him and find someone else. When he tells you things like "shouldn't you be telling your man that" he is just teasing you. When he asks you about the mystery guy that you like just keep it casual and easily respond by saying "yeah I still like the guy and no I haven't told him. Right now I'm just going to concetrate on other things that are going on in my life. If he really likes me and wants to be with me he will tell me. If he doesn't tell me then I guess he doesn't like me and I will just have to move on." --- that should light a fire under his ass to make him move faster. Keep us posted and good luck!
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