A
male
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:me and my ex just broke up a month ago and she has a new bf. how ever she wants to be friends. she texts me every couple of days to chat,calls me on occasions, and wants to be able to "see me" because i "mean the world to her". Not sure if i can live with being a casual friend like this but i dont want to lose her since she has been in my life fir 5 years. suggestions plz?
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broke up, my ex, text Reply to this Question
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male
reader, dannn  +, writes (13 March 2011):
M8t I haven't heard from my ex lady in a week, it's killing me, I don't know whether or not I should date again (don't really have the desire to), shoot at text telling her she still has some of my stuff, or just keep the distance. You're ex lady's got a man, mines got a man, we just aren't needed anymore.... I really don't know how someone could live with themselves and feel no remorse over doing something like that. If you lived anywhere near me I'd say bro times is a must, shoot some pool and grab a beer. No problem, best of luck, and hopefully you can be friends or more
A
reader, anonymous, writes (13 March 2011): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThanks for the reply dan. Too bad I havent heard from her since. Some friemd huh? Lol
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A
male
reader, dannn +, writes (11 March 2011):
I'd say respond but don't leave the conversation open to continue. Such as if she texted you "Hey how's your day" being polite back "good hope you're doing fine." shows that you're not ignoring her, but also doesn't leave much room for her to continue. I don't agree with ignoring people unless they're huge twats, and in this case I'm sure as much as it bugs you that she's with another dude and not your girlfriend you don't think she's a twat. I think being friends is possible later on down the road but not at the moment.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (10 March 2011): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionIs it worth being friends with an ex from your experiences? And should I jus ignore her texts?
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (10 March 2011): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionYea this situation sucks.. So when she casually txts mee again should I not reply? And is it even worth trying to be friends in ur opinions?
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (10 March 2011): Tell her to stop for a while because you need to get over he properly before you can be friends. If she keeps this up you will lose her as a friend for good because it will be too painful for you and hurt too much having her as a friend but not a lover.
Tell her you need time, to leave you alone for a while until such a time as you feel ready to be "friends" but in all honesty that might never happen but the only way it will is if you take some time to get over her.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (10 March 2011): This amount of contact is not good after a breakup. Tell her you need to back off for a while in order to heal.
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A
female
reader, GeeGee255 +, writes (10 March 2011):
 It is probably not a good idea after just a month. You are just a habit she is having a hard time breaking at this point. Tell her you care for her and wish her the best but you need some time and distance from her for a while in order to heal and move on with your own life.
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A
male
reader, dannn +, writes (10 March 2011):
In a similar situation m8t, I'm taking the approach or being polite back but not a friend back, so I'll respond to a text or take a call but won't be too responsive. In my situation she started seeing the dude just before she broke it off, and didn't call it what it was, (which is basically cheating). I think it's extremely rude and disrespectful especially for you who've known her for 5 years to treat you so poorly. I'd give yourself some distance, she should know that she can't treat you that way and get all the benefits of being friends with you. That's my reasoning anyways. I'm sure you love her and don't want her in your life but she's walking over you m8t, maybe try and start dating. Look online about stuff like this it can be encouraging.
Anyways good luck!!! Keep us posted as I'm interested in how your scenario works out.
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