A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:I have recently split from a 4 year relationship due to my partner thinking he wanted space but then i found out he was meeting another girl which he claims is all innocent. We split just before christmas and i started to get on with my life and i met this guy but there is a distance problem as he lives quite far away and its quite a mission to see him at times.whilst i was seeing him my ex found out and decided he wanted me back and acted like quite a stalker as he realised i had met someone else and he might of lost me due to his stupidity. I had enough of the distance with the other guy so i finished it but now cant stop thinking of him but my friends think my ex has changed and that i should give him another try as we were together 4 years and we were happy for most of out time together. I dont no whether to take a gamble and try again with the new lad or try and make things work with my ex again as he says he is sorry for letting me go.
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, superfly  +, writes (11 June 2007):
Yes get back together...This happened to my friend and their husband...she got back together with him when she(who seeing someone else first) wanted to get back together when she learned he was seeing someone.
They got back together and is happily married, with a 2story mansion, 2kids, landcruiser, bmw-5series, and much happiness.
DO-IT, TRY-IT OUT, B/C LIFE HAS THE OPPORTUNITY TO BRING A TON OF HAPPINESS IN IT'S MOST WEIRD WAYS....DO IT!!
GOOD LUCK!!
A
male
reader, DV1 +, writes (5 June 2007):
 As a guy, I can tell you not to go back to him. You're his B choice, or his last resort, second choice. You're the one he dates when he can't have anyone else. Continue moving on. You'll find someone better.
DV1
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A
female
reader, Country Woman +, writes (5 June 2007):
 Unfortunately I feel like the ex just wanted what he couldn't have and if he has made the mistake then that was down to him.
OK he may have changed but there are no guarantees at all.
He basically put a new female infront of a relationship that had been good for 4 years and now when he realised that the grass was not greener on the other side he wants back what he chucked away.
What is to say that if you got back with him another female in the future catches his eye and he dumps you again. He lied to you about wanting some space and all he really wanted was this other girl.
I think the guy you have been seeing is purely a distance problem but if you care enough about him then you can overcome that. Don't let your ex put you off of someone who could be great for you. Talk to this lad and see how he feels about it as he may feel that he doesn't want to be dumped and then picked up again, so see how the water lies with him first.
I think your ex stalking you made you question your new relationship and that is just not on. Explain this to your new lad and tell him how miserable you have been since you broke it off with him and see what he says.
If things do not work out with this new lad I would still say give your ex a wide birth. Your friends may say that he has changed but do they really know him or is he just putting on a good front to try and get you back, it has been done many times before and then after you are back with them their true colours show.
Wish you well.
Take care.
Country Woman
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