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age
36-40,
anonymous
writes: hi,my name is deanna. i am heartbroken over a broken relationship. for over 3 months now, my ex and i had officially broke up.i really need advice. he obviously had got over me. i honestly love him, but due to the fact that he doesn't want me for good, even after two years and also after going through together so much, even i beg him, he still doesn't want me for good, i ask for a breakup. he was relieved bout it, so i know i making the right decision.funny that i truly hope i was wrong. i called him sometimes to know how he is and i also (stupidly) offer some info on how i am. i always end up crying. he sounded so 'over' me. i tried to make him jealous about another guy, he actually encouraged me to go for it. i feel like he is throwing me over to any another guy. honestly, i was hoping he would want me back. i want him to want me. not just for fun, but for real.after many phone calls (i did this about once every 2 weeks) which i end up crying, i realize, we could not be friends at all. we will pretend not knowing each other (this is my another request).what is wrong with me? i really try to get over him. but i am still so heartbroken. please advice me what am i to do next. i want to survive this breakup and i feel i am doing everything wrong. please offer me some advice.. i will truly appreciate it. thank you.
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a break, broke up, heartbroken, jealous, my ex Reply to this Question
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reader, anonymous, writes (13 September 2010): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionto the anonymous,
you mentioned earlier 'Too many people believe you just move on, forget the person you love, well IF you can, then you didn't love them that much in the first place.'
since he already move on, very quickly, does it means that he didn't love me that much in the first place?
i just want to know.. i truly appreciate it..
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reader, anonymous, writes (7 September 2010): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionthank you all.. i guess, i still need time to heal.. i just wish it doesn't have to hurt this much..
thank you very much for your advice.. i just need to accept it and be strong.. i love him dearly and sincerely, but i know he does not want me that much.. i wish i could fast forward the healing time so i could reach the healed time..
thank you for giving me advice that does not make me feel worst than i already am.. thank you very much..
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reader, anonymous, writes (3 September 2010): You cannot tell someone to just move on. If you know anything at all about emotions, then you would know, by tearing up photos, banishing numbers is not going to do anything.
This woman may be young - but the point you have missed, you cant STOP loving someone by trying to obliterate them from your life. Try, and you start carrying emotional baggage into future relationships. There is nothing wrong with GOING through your emotions, feeling them, every painful damn part, it's what makes you grow emotionally and come out the other side.
Too many people believe you just move on, forget the person you love, well IF you can, then you didn't love them that much in the first place. There is no harm in experiencing and allowing love to die naturally. That does not mean to say you don't try to make your life better or do things, as and when you start to feel stronger...only trying to just STOP and BLANK everything is not very emotionally intelligent!
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reader, anonymous, writes (3 September 2010): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionhi taksa and petinal,
i know you both are right, but i just can't help missing him so much. i really have tried to go out more often with my friends and enjoy with my friends. i actually did everything there is to do in order to get over an ex. but i always slipped back where miss him very much that i end up calling him. it is effecting my work and my sleeping habit.
i know you both are right. but i still find it very difficult..
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female
reader, petina1  +, writes (2 September 2010):
 I'm sorry but he is over you. You don't want to be accused of being a 'bunny boiler'. I suggest you don't have anything to do with him, delete his number, tear up any photos. That way you must convince yourself that you arent bothered then over time you will be over him. If you can't do this you will give yourself heart ache for a long time and in danger of looking a fool by chasing him. Save all your energy for the one special person who will deserve you. Then you will receive love as well as give it. Hope this helps
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reader, anonymous, writes (2 September 2010): Move on. You are young, around my age, and there are still plenty of fish in the sea. Every time you try to contact him, you are pouring salt on your own wounds. I don't think you will ever feel better as long as you are reaching out to him. I say cut of all communication, lick your wounds, give yourself some time to heal. If you want to eventually stay friends, thats great. However, I am a great advocate of giving yourself some time to heal. I think you should truly move on with your life first and then try to reestablish a friendship. Best wishes to you, and remember-time heals all:)
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