A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:Basically, my friends and I went to this event called Midnight Rodeo. It's a country place/bar where you dance two-step and things like that. It was for my friend's birthday party; she went to drink for her 21st birthday so we separated once we got there. It ended up being me, my guy friend J and my girl friend C. Here's some history between us, J and I used to like each other and went on dates, and C used to like K (my boyfriend). Things didn't work out between C and K nor did it for me and J. So I ended up dating K and we've been together for two years. Throughout that whole time, we've all been good friends, hanging out together with some other friends as much as possible.Anyways, throughout the night (K was unable to attend), J would constantly lean very close to me. For example, I'd be sitting on a chair and he'd come and sit so close that our knees touched. Or we were sitting on the couch and he would sit, arms outstretched around my shoulders, and leaned in to me. Also, when I refused to dance, he desperately tried to get me to and pulled my hand, (well more like holding it, clasped) and wouldn't let go until I loosened my grip quite a bit to where my hand was very lax. At one point, he was so close to me that I turned my head to say something and our faces were close to kissing that I pulled away quickly. I was also asked if he was my boyfriend, which was very embarrassing because I have a boyfriend and he's C's best friend...My question is, does J still have feelings for me? Or am I over reading? Lately, he's been talking to me a lot, texting me to hang out and messaging me on facebook ever since we started hanging out at uni (since I have a break and he does too, but no one else does at that time). Maybe he's just being a friend and I'm thinking too much into it because we used to have a thing. Please confirm. Thank you!
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (26 November 2013): Was J drinking? Alcohol can make people do things they wouldn't otherwise do. I think he was definitely flirting and coming onto you a little, but held himself JUST on the edge of "inappropriate". If K were there, that probably wouldn't have happened and if it did, he probably would have been upset. I'm not saying you did anything wrong (because you weren't), but you seemed uncomfortable and embarrassed and maybe a little worried all that would get back to K. J does sound like he's coming onto you a little and possibly trying to edge himself out of the FriendZone, which isn't fair to his best friend (K). I guess the best advice I can think of is for you to back it off a little, be less approachable to him. Not because he's bad, but because he sounds like he's getting a little too close for comfort.
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