A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:I need advice and asap! normally I'm good at giving out advice but this time I'm stuck. My ex contacted me and said he still likes me but he had a girlfriend at the time, now they have broken up but i keep seeing them together and tonight I saw them kissing. He has really hurt me! I want to move on and get on with my life but I still have really strong feelings for him. any advice on how I can move on? because right now I wanna die, my life isnt worth living anymore. HELP!!! plz asapxxxxxthankyou
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kissing, move on, my ex Reply to this Question
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reader, anonymous, writes (4 April 2007): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questioni know all of that now and thankyou ever so much for all of your help. but how can i move on? i want to so i know this will help but is there anything i can do to help me move on faster.x
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (4 April 2007): Maybe he wanted to mess with your head and make you hurt (when you saw him kissing his ex) when he said that he still likes you. He was probably lying when he said that. Move on, he's not worth your feelings for him. I know that moving on is hard but it happens with time.
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A
male
reader, Dr. John  +, writes (4 April 2007):
 Sweetheart, you are still young. There may be several times you will think you have found the right guy only to realize later that mabe he wasn't the one after all.
This guy aparently isn't that worried about you or he would drop the other girl altogether. Go find a guy that is interested in you, and you alone. One that will treat you right. They are out there you know. Just spend a little time and have patience. you will find him. Doc.
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A
male
reader, ChiRaven +, writes (4 April 2007):
 How you move on is simple to say but hard to do. Find another guy and get involved with him.
The problem is one of maturity. At your age, people are changing rather rapidly. You see this all around you, as couples come together for a while and then break up. It's not that they don't really love one another when they start out, it's just that one or both of them change very quickly and they have different needs and wants. Females tend to be a bit more mature, and thus more stable, than males at your age. You probably know your mind, but the guy you like can't seem to make up his mind.
If you can stand being really daring and really mature about this (and have a high tolerance for possible rejection) you might try just asking this guy about the whole situation. Be up front about what you want and ask him to do the same. This might work, although the odds are against it because, as I said earlier, he's probably pretty confused himself. In fact, I would be surprised to see a letter here someplace from a guy your age who just broke up with his girlfriend and really wants to get together with this new girl he likes but still has some feelings for his ex and ended up kissing her recently and the new girl saw him and ... well, you get the picture.
Good luck.
If you do move on, it will mean some heartache, but that's part of growing, too. We all have to go through that in our lives. Nobody gets away without it. It's too bad, but there it is.
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A
female
reader, Gem86 +, writes (4 April 2007):
 Hey huni, Ive been in a situation where I had to watch my ex be with someone else, and I know its not nice.
Trust me: your life is not over!!
If I were you right now, I would try not to see him/talk to him as often (or at all for now), because you're only going to make your pain worse. This blokes obviously is interested in this other girl, therefore you need to move on. Spend more time with your mates, meet new people, do new things. Keep yourself busy! And honnestly, you'll get over it.
I know you're hurt but its going to get easier. Take care xxx
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