A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes: my ex bf and i have hung out quite few times since the break up and yes we have "hooked up" but told me he cant give me false hope that we are getting back together..what does that mean? will he change his mind? Reply to this Question Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, llifton +, writes (23 August 2013):
it means that he's not looking to get back together with you and he's hoping not to lead you on. he's sleeping with you because it's easy and convenient and because he's comfortable with you. but he doesn't want any of the emotions and obligations that come along with being in a relationship. i doubt he will change his mind. you should move on and see other people. let him see what he's missing out on.
A
female
reader, TasteofIndia +, writes (23 August 2013):
He's said plainly that there's no hope, and I don't think that there is. I definitely would not wait around for him to change his mind, because I think that will be a grand waste of your time! The best thing that you can do is to move on - and I think the only way you can move on is by stopping the no-strings-attached booty, and not letting him get that part of you. He lost that privilege when you two broke up. I'm sorry that you have to go through this the hard way, sweet. Good luck!
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (23 August 2013): "what does that mean?"
It means he only wants casual no-strings sex on a regular and frequent basis strictly for his pleasure strictly at his convenience.
I give him credit, most guys who are still boinking their ex-girlfriends would be stringing them along with implied or false promises. He just wants to take what you're giving.
"will he change his mind?"
No. Why should he? What would he stand to gain? As things stand you're still putting out for him but now he doesn't even have to buy you dinner, let alone demonstrate any obligation or commitment or fidelity. As my long-deceased grandmother would have said, "Why buy the cow when the milk is free?"
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A
female
reader, person12345 +, writes (23 August 2013):
No he won't change his mind. If you want to get back together with him, hooking up will only end in you getting hurt. He just wants sex and views you as a sure thing and safe. Break ups are like ripping off a band aid. It's best to get it done as quickly and cleanly as possible. It hurts more right in the beginning, but you will heal faster. Dragging it out by hooking up and trying to be friends could mean years of being hung up on him.
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A
female
reader, Got Issues +, writes (23 August 2013):
If you have feelings for him then you have to stop seeing him. By telling you he doesn't want to "give you false hope" he is basically saying he just wants NSA sex with you until he meets someone else.
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