A
female
age
36-40,
*i_the_tree
writes:Grrrrr, i can't believe I am yet again posting about my ex...He owes me money for a car that i sold back to him before the summer (at his request might i add) I have sent him a couple of reminder emails, but just get fobbed off each time, last one said he lost one of his jobs so he's struggling to find money.However through the magic of facebook, low and behold he has gone and bought himself another car! I don't know if he sold the old one (which he owes me for) or if he's still got it.My point is, is it worth me going through all the emotions i once felt to ask him for £750, or do i not bother and miss out on my money? Is there a legal way i can force him to cough up? His girlfriend works in a solicitors so she would try and pick any legal thing apart.What do you guys think? I've been waiting for this money for 6 months now.
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female
reader, maverick494  +, writes (16 November 2012):
Thanks for the follow-up, OP.
I get that if you blocked him you don't want to unblock him on fb, but I really think the amount of money is too big to let it slide over that. Of course, if you manage to reach him through e-mail, then that's preferable.
Like others said, e-mail may be a way to get at least something in writing about owing you. And if you split up the amount in several payments (appoint each of them a specific date so he doesn't 'forget') it shouldn't be hard for him at all to pay you back. The reason I listed fb is because I thought you had exhausted all other options.
As for Daisy_Daisy's point of him being able to delete your posts: there will always be people that see it. And if he keeps taking it off quickly and you pop it back up, they are going to notice something is up. Trust me, it's funny how people can suddenly change when their online reputation is at stake. I got my money back that way when e-mails didn't work.
But sure, try e-mailing again. And don't relent, this time. Give him two or three days to respond, then send another one again. If it doesn't work, take it on facebook. You can always block him again after all this is over and you got your money back. All the while consult a professional to see if you can make a case out of it.
Whatever you do, don't just let it go. At least not before you've tried everything you could to get it back. He's got something that's yours. Leaving it be and chalking it up to a learning experience is only going to make you feel bad and reward him, when it should be the other way around.
A
female
reader, Daisy_Daisy +, writes (15 November 2012):
 Try going to the Citizen's Advice Bureau.
http://www.citizensadvice.org.uk/index/getadvice
They will advise whether or not it's suitable to take to the Small Claims Court.
You need to try and sort it out between you first, though. If you're not sure about his email address, send him a letter using 'recorded & signed for'. Keep the letter concise and civil.
I don't really agree with naming and shaming him on Facebook. Plus, he can just delete the post.
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (15 November 2012): As any lawyer would ask, is there any paper work?
No? Then kiss it goodbye and move on. If there is, small claims court. And works in a laywers office does not make his gf a lawyer.
Best advice? Talk to a lawyer, most have free intakes where they can advice you on the merits of your case and don't worry think laywers will always tell you to proceed, they won't because giving wrong advice is a very serious breach of their rules and they can be barred for life for that.
Your city might also have a legal help desk.
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A
female
reader, sugarplum786  +, writes (15 November 2012):
 Hi, first I would contact him in email and keep it friendly, asking him when can you expect your money. If you get it in writing that he owes you and acknowledge the agreement was for a car he bought from from. There is nothing his girlfriend can do to weasel him out of the debt. Just make sure you have him acknowledging he bought the car and owes you the money. Be nice and ask him if he can pay it in 3 installments. Also mention in the discussion if the agreement was that he pays you within a year 3 months ect as this you can use as he breached the agreement terms even if virbal.
Once you have eberything in writing, seek legal assistance with the proof and also ask the lawyer to recover your legal cost from him as he breached the agreement.
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A
female
reader, So_Very_Confused +, writes (15 November 2012):
 personally I would chalk it up to lessons learned and let it go.
my ex husband owes me $2k I will never see it. He's probably forgotten about it but it speaks to the kind of man he is...
would you have sold a car to a stranger with them OWING you the money? Probably not, but when we love someone we do things that make sense.
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A
female
reader, fi_the_tree +, writes (15 November 2012):
fi_the_tree is verified as being by the original poster of the question I have him blocked on facebook (seeing as his girlfriend used to be a close friend of mine anyway) because i needed to move on from him. I don't particularly want to unblock him either. The only way i can contact him is via email (depending if his email address is still active!)
I may get some friends to go snooping, see if he still has the old car. If he does then i can say either pay me the money for it, or give me the car back (you have no idea how much this car meant to him in the first place) If i do get it back, then i can sell it on to someone else i guess...
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A
female
reader, Aunty BimBim  +, writes (15 November 2012):
 Actually I like Maverick's idea of contacting him on his facebook wall, where everybody can see it.
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A
female
reader, Aunty BimBim +, writes (15 November 2012):
Forget the email, phone him, tell him you are aware he has bought a new car and you would like him to repay the $750 he owes you. Then ask him when it would be convenient for you to drop by and pick it up.
But to be honest, I think you have done your dough. If you have no proof and nothing in writing you don't have much chance of recovering it.
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A
female
reader, maverick494 +, writes (15 November 2012):
*oops I switched £ with $*
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A
female
reader, maverick494 +, writes (15 November 2012):
Do not give up. It's too big an amount to let slide. I was in a similar situation once and also thanks to facebook I was able to get it back by constant nagging and therefore tainting the page.
Simply leave a message on facebook, saying: "I hate doing this, but since you have ignored my previous efforts, I see no other choice to contact you here. I really need the money you owe me. I have been waiting for 6 months now. Your excuse was that you had money troubles yourself, but since you just bought yourself a new car those problems should no longer prevent you from being able to pay me back the $750 that's rightly mine. Please get in touch."
I know this is awfully diplomatic, but by being as gracious as you can he'll look worse in comparison. Keep nagging him on his public page. If he has an ounce of decency he'll get back to you.
I don't know about legal action: do you have proof he has the money he owes you? If not it's just your word against his and they cannot do much.
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