A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:Heres the deal I dated this guy when I was 13 and he was 15. We'll I ended it then becuase he cheated on me. We stayed friends which may seem weird to some people but it seemed to work for us. Thing is even after 8yrs, I still have feelings for him. A few months ago we met up to catch up. Well he had recently gotten married to his on and off girlfriend of like 10yrs. He wasnt happy. Well things went to far, but he says he didnt regret it. I do becuase I never wanted to be the "other woman". He says he wont leave her becuase she's ill but he wants to be with me. The thing is I'm not the only one he's with. I havent talked to him in almost 2months. I'm in a relationship with a good guy who says he loves me but I just cant seem to get my ex out of my head. I want to put my whole heart into this relatonship but I just keep thinking what if he does leave her. My boyfriend now is talking marriage but I cant seem to give him an answer yes or no or when. I just dont know what to do. What can I do?
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female
reader, QuirkLady +, writes (24 May 2009):
 Tell your boyfriend you're not ready to be married. It wouldn't be fair to take a vow to love him and nobody else while you're still thinking about your ex-boyfriend.
On to your ex. He straight out told you he is not leaving his wife. You know he is a cheater, and that you are not the only one he is cheating with. He has already shown that he doesn't honor his relationships, why do you think he will change? Why should he change, when he can have the wife at home and a girl on the side whenever he wants without doing a thing?
What if he does leave his wife? What if he DOESN'T? What if he does leave her, gets with you, then leaves you two months later?
You made the right decision in not talking to him. Keep it up. Right now he has too much power over your heart.
Good luck.
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (24 May 2009): You don't sound even ready for marriage and probably not in love with the guy you're with so you should let him find someone that truly loves him. The ex is a cheater so not really a good choice. Maybe go on your own until you can find the right relationship?
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