A
male
age
41-50,
*architectyumyum
writes:My ex-girlfriend and I lived together for about three years. We ended up having a son together, and then we broke up shortly after. She has custody of my son, while I pay support and visit him on weekends.The weird thing is she is now my dad's girlfriend. He is fat and old (52) but gets women's attention because he has a lot of money. After my mom died, he got married again and made a lot of money. My stepmom lets him have affairs with whoever he wants.One time I went to visit my son, they were in the pool together making out. It was really disturbing. My girlfriend was in this blue bikini sitting between my dad's legs. She still looks really hot. My dad was rubbing all over her body and it was just really gross.Now I found out she's pregnant again with my dad's baby. This totally freaks me out! It can't be healthy if my son grows up with a half-brother who is also MY half-brother. Should I get a lawyer to take custody of my son? Or is this just pointless jealousy?
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affair, broke up, ex girlfriend, jealous, money Reply to this Question
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (21 July 2009): wow, i know the ex gf is scum but your dad too. if i am not mistaken he is still married to your stepmom, right?? doesn't say much about his character does it. and obviously that of your ex. well, at least you do not have to worry about that sloppy seconds any more. be glad that the good time girl is not with you. what you can be guaranteed of is this -their affair will end, maybe not soon but it will since your dad loves women so much. but just don't take his seconds, please.
regarding your child- you have every right to be concerned. this relationship has nothing to do with love, only lust. so your child will be hurt in the long run. get him away from these two quickly. and then run far away from your dad and his *hore. (but be careful you do not throw good money after bad, the courts may not rule that she is an unfit mother, just a "loose" one??)
if the green eyed monster has reared its ugly head, its ok. you have emotions and you are actually feeling disgusted right now. feel the pain, the hurt but please move on. she is not worth it. he definately isn't as well. there are decent women in this world. i think you just havn't met the right one. you will be foolish to still think that there may be a future for you both, after what she has done to you, don't even consider anything with her. she will break your heart all over again. so, put on that smile, give yourself a mental shakeup, and start working on your self esteem, insecurities and go out and live your life. happiness can be found again. you need to open your heart to it. i think the time is now.
A
female
reader, eyeswideopen +, writes (20 July 2009):
 Wow, definitely talk to a lawyer about this Jerry Springer-like situation. Most certainly not a healthy environment for your son.
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (20 July 2009): Your ex is your ex. That means exactly what it says: her relationships are her business. They're consenting adults and should have private lives without your interference. And don't even try to fight custody. The courts say they rule "in the best interest of the child." That means MOM gets custody 95% of the time. You might have a shot if she was on drugs but not just because she's having sex with someone else even your dad.
Focus on earning child support for your boy.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (20 July 2009): I am appauled at this utter disregard for both childs mental and emotional health and security displayed by your ex and, worse, your own Father. Your Father is about to have a child with the mother of his grandchild. Can you get custody of your son now this new information /situation has come about? Surely it is not right for a child to grow up in such perverted circumstances!!!! I would get legal advice you owe it to your own son to be able to offer him a stable, normal, upbringing. If I were you I would fight all the way its nothing to do with jealousy you must be disgusted at your ex yuk.. its about moral standards and decency. Its about showing a child the correct way to behave as an adult and setting a good example. You can do those things for your son - he will not get that where he is. How revolting, I'm sorry for your situation but you have to do the right thing.
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A
male
reader, rcn +, writes (20 July 2009):
 This is disturbing. Personally, I'd seek custody. Moral fitness is a main factor in deciding custody cases. It sounds as if this is lacking. The question though would be, aside from this, how is she as a parent. If I were a judge, I'd see this situation as not being a proper environment to raise a child, but where states vary in law, the stronger the case the better.
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